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EP242 From Endo, Low AMH and A Less Than 1 Percent Chance To Pregnant Naturally: Pauline’s Story

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Innhold levert av Rosanne Austin. Alt podcastinnhold, inkludert episoder, grafikk og podcastbeskrivelser, lastes opp og leveres direkte av Rosanne Austin eller deres podcastplattformpartner. Hvis du tror at noen bruker det opphavsrettsbeskyttede verket ditt uten din tillatelse, kan du følge prosessen skissert her https://no.player.fm/legal.

A “geriatric” medical professional with her endometriosis in full swing and low AMH, Pauline was told that she had at best a 1% chance of conceiving. She responded “poorly” to IVF with just 2 eggs retrieved–neither made it to blastocyst. That’s when Pauline and I met. You will hear that Pauline went from being a “poor responder,” to getting and staying pregnant naturally within MONTHS. Learn the gangster moves that this Miracle Mama made to call in her precious girl. If you need a strong shot of faith and more reasons to believe in yourself AND your body, you will LOVE what Pauline has to share. AND don’t miss her “golf-ball” story!

Want the journal page that goes with this episode? CLICK HERE

Transcript:
Hey Gorgeous. If you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, fertility mindset master, former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.

It’s time to get fearless baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile podcast episode 242. From endo, low AMH and a 1 percent chance to pregnant naturally. Pauline’s story. Hey, loves. Ooh, I got a doozy for you this week. Oh, you are gonna fall in love with Pauline. Don’t you just love all of these women?

Like, it’s just crazy. So kind, so generous, sharing their stories to lift all of us up on this journey is so good. And I bet it’s pretty obvious to you why I, I just leap out of bed in the morning because I get to work with these women, just so committed, so big hearted, so loving, they keep their word, they do the work, and they follow through, they stay focused on the dream.

I mean, I just Oh, I just can’t get enough of this. And you’re going to just fall in love with Pauline because with her endometriosis in full swing and low AMH, Pauline was told that she had at best a 1 percent chance of conceiving. She had tried IVF. They told her that was going to be the only way. She was a poor responder.

She got just two eggs retrieved. And neither made it to Blastocyst. And at that point, Pauline had a choice to make. And she did something incredibly gangster. And I cannot wait for you to hear her share her testimony in her own words. Because she did something that most women would not. She did a full pivot.

And she ended up calling in this beautiful baby of hers. In a way, they told her it was probably not going to happen, and she did it in record time. It’s truly extraordinary. So I hope that you will turn this one up. If you have been told something crazy about your body, told that you have a less than 1 percent chance, I mean, look, my ladies routinely beat 1 percent odds, like left and right.

All you have to do is scroll through the list of podcasts to hear that, to know it’s true. So, If you’re in a place where you’re really struggling because of your diagnosis or whatever the case may be, pay close attention to what Pauline is going to share because I assure you, she would tell you that if she could do it, so can you.

So here is my conversation with Miracle Mama, Pauline. Woman, we’re gonna just jump straight in because this is a conversation I have been looking forward to having for a long time. Thank you. That’s fine with me. Well, so why don’t you start off by just sharing with the women listening, like how did you find yourself on this journey?

And then how did we meet? Yeah, definitely. So my dream began. So I was diagnosed with endometriosis in my early twenties. It happened to be just kind of a coincidental finding when I got an ID placed, so they removed the cyst and then biopsied it and then ended up finding that I had endometriosis. So I was like, okay, no big deal.

And then my twenties, I don’t care at that point, right? So yeah, so then flash forward to maybe, I think it was like maybe three, 34, 33, around there. Yeah, I met my husband and we decided we wanted to have a baby together. So, you know, we were trying and then I already kind of knew, I was like, well, I know endometriosis is kind of hard stuff.

Um, to conceive a baby when you do have that. So I was already like, you know what? We probably need to see a specialist for this. So I was already like on the game for that. So we went to, actually one of my friends recommended a clinic that was in, um, Colorado or down in Denver. And so we ended up meeting with the doc there and just kind of talking about everything and, and yeah, so he was like, well, let’s just run some tests and see kind of like where we’re at on things and all that good stuff.

And so. I remember I was working, I remember the exact same time where I was working, and then ended up reading my lab results, and so I’m just like Googling all these things, because I’m like, I don’t know what all these tests mean. So then I go to the AMH portion of it and it was super, super low. It was like, I think 0.

16, I think. So I was just kind of like, I don’t know what that means. And so looking it up, it was like, basically I have like. Very low egg reserve, so I was freaking out a little bit about that, so then we ended up going back into meeting with the doc again, and he basically was saying, like, your chances of conceding naturally is probably like less than 1%, giving your, your, yeah, I was just like, what?

At that point, I was just like, well, I didn’t know really how to take the news. I was just kind of like, it should be fine. But yeah, but he told me straight up, it was just like less than 1 percent your age. Cause you know, I’m a geriatric pregnant, it would be. So he was like, yeah. So he’s just like, well, your age and you know, you have endometriosis, your animation is very, very low.

So, you know, it’s least likely you’re going to be, you’re going to get like, get pregnant naturally. So, my husband, or my fiancee at this point, so he went back and we’re like, you know what, let’s just try, like, we haven’t gotten married yet, let’s just kind of get the marriage, the wedding stuff out of the way, and then we’ll kind of start there.

So, instead of like going straight into IVF, because obviously after that, he was like, you need to do IVF, like, that’s the only way you’re going to get pregnant is through IVF. And so Yeah, so we got married and granted it was during COVID of course, so we had to postpone our wedding. So we were supposed to get married in June and then we had to postpone the wedding until September and so after that we started trying and I think we were trying for about like maybe a good four or five months and then I was kind of like, you know what, maybe we do need to do like, yeah, if everybody, all my friends around me, they were, everybody was getting pregnant left and right.

It was just like, why aren’t we getting pregnant? Like what’s happening here? So. So I decided to be like, all right, let’s just go back in. Let’s just do a round of the IVF. Maybe that’s just what we need. So yes, we went in, talked to the doc, and then we got everything started with the IVF, which was the most terrible process.

So I give a lot of credit to a lot of women who’ve done this more than once. Um, one time was like, what had done was kind of my, my thoughts there, because the shots were terrible, kills, the timing of everything. So Yeah, so we ended up doing one round of IBS and I just remember when they were doing the harvesting of my eggs, the egg collection, I remember I only had two eggs that they collected and it was so heartbreaking because I remember, I’m sorry to interrupt a little bit, I remember when I was like sitting in the little like Postop area.

And you know, they don’t have, like, it’s not a private room, obviously. There’s just like curtains and you can just, you know, you can hear the other like people coming in from after they, what? When they got their eggs collected and everything like that. And so the lady next to me, they’re like, oh, you got like eggs.

And then the lady, the lady next on the other side was like 20 eggs. And I was like, oh. And so they said, they write down like, excuse me. They write down, you know, how many eggs you got, and I looked down at my hand, and it was like two, and we’re like, oh, so then we have like a really small percent chance to get pregnant, if these are even viable, and so, you know, they go, they incubate it, they do all the good stuff with that, so we get a call the next day from the lab, and they’re like, well, one egg didn’t make it into the blastocyst stage and everything, so we used to have one that actually made it, so we’re super excited, we’re Yes, like this probably is the one and everything and so they’re like, well, we wouldn’t, we won’t call you for the next until like maybe five days later and then we can let you know if it’s, if it’s survived and if we can, if it’s developing into an embryo and all that stuff.

And so, yeah, so we were like, okay, cool. So we were all excited about it. And I remember driving into work and they called me like about 15 hours. Yeah. So didn’t make it. So. Sorry, and that was it. I was like, all right, great. So I have to go into work, like just feeling just like super defeated and just like, what are we going to do now?

Like it’s all my fault, like with everything going on. And my husband was great through all of this. Like never blame me for anything. He was like, you know, whatever you want to do, it’s up to you. So anyway, so we go back to this reproductive doctor and he. Tells me, like, you know, IVF didn’t work for you, I mean, we could do another round, but, I mean, most likely it’s not gonna work for you, so let’s just move to donor eggs, like, right now, and so, he’s giving me all these numbers and statistics, like, you know, this is, like, if you do get pregnant, like, these are the chances, like, there can be some abnormalities and all this stuff going on, so, I remember just crying in the office, just like, oh my gosh, and he’s just kind of looking at me, like, kind of, you know, it is what it is, like, Just let me know if you want to do another round of IVF.

Then he just left. So then my husband and I left the office and, and then my husband just looks at me and he’s just like, you know what? Like it’s up to you. It’s your body. If you want to do a second round, fine, we can do it. But if you don’t want to put yourself through that, I’ve been watching you put yourself through the shots and all that stuff.

And so, yeah, it’s up to you. We don’t have to do another round. And so it’s like, fine. Yeah. Like, let’s just. You know, I was like, let’s just sleep on it. We’ll see. I don’t know if I want to do that again as well. So then I ended up just like going hardcore looking at. Different diets, all these different things to do to kind of help increase my chances of getting naturally.

I’m listening to all these podcasts and all of a sudden with a funny, probably like that funny, like algorithm Facebook does, but your podcast popped up onto my feed. And I was like, Oh, like this lady looks kind of like, it was the pink hair you had at the time, the pink and the black. So I was like, Oh yeah, she’s my style.

Like I liked her style, so I’m just going to listen to her because all the other podcasts I was listening to, granted, they were very informational, but you know, it was very like, I don’t know, it wasn’t something that I needed, like advice wise. So I just wasn’t clicking for me. So yeah, so I ended up stumbling across your podcast and the rest is history.

I just was listening to it and I was just like, like blown away by how real you were with everything. And just kind of like. Napping yourself out of this rut and just like telling people how to like get your shit together. This is like, you know, all the stuff you got to do and kind of work on yourself.

And I ended up buying your book as well, which also turned me on. So just being like, all right, I feel like I need to just sign up for her class. And I just, I think that was the best investment that I’ve ever done. Oh yeah. I forgot to also mention when I was on this, like fertility journey, you know, I was doing, I think I did, I did.

So much acupuncture, which was great, but they were also making me drink like these weird herbs and stuff. And I remember your story with like going to Chinatown and getting the black chicken or something like that. I was like, I didn’t get that extreme, but yeah. So I felt like I did so many things, but then coming across your, your podcast.

And then, yeah, that, that’s just kind of how I ended up finding you. And I’m so grateful to this day because. Yeah, I have a, a lovely little nine month old actually in a couple of days. And so yeah, and it’s the best thing ever being a mom is just so amazing. So yeah, that’s, that’s my journey to you Rosie and so, and I just, man, it’s so interesting to me because, well, first of all, I have to ask you this question because.

You remember when we first met, you remember when we had our first conversation, did you ever imagine what it would be like to have this conversation? Did you ever imagine that you would go from being a listener to this podcast, then go into the program and then now being a guest? Not at all. I was not even thinking it.

I was just like, no, I mean, it’s not, it’s not gonna happen. And that was the thing, was like my thought, my whole thought process back then was so negative and I was like, eh, I’m not gonna make it. And I’m just hearing all these women are like, my goal is to get on the podcast and that never was my goal.

But I was like, you know what? That is gonna be my goal. Like I’m gonna get on this podcast. But yes, I would not have imagined, like if you would have told me this, like, Two years ago, I’d have been like, you’re crazy. Like, have you seen the statistic? Have you seen the statistics and the numbers? Like, no, I’m never going to get this right.

Well, I mean, so let’s dive into that because I love, well, and you’re, you’re in medicine. So you understand, like you probably understand more than most people what the statistics are saying. Right? Like, to be told by somebody in a white coat, for better or worse, right? That, A, you got a less than 1 percent chance of conceiving naturally.

Like, your whole world can be like, Bwaaah! You know, like, you can Because that sounds basically like it’s not happening. Right. So, so what made you as a medical professional, like want to look in this mindset area? Because you, Pauline, you could have easily said, you know what? That sounds like fine. Her podcast is maybe a little funny and it’s kind of kick ass, but like, why would I do that and do this program knowing what I know?

Because tons of women. Are thinking that way like I don’t need this because you know what the doctors already told me I have a less than 1 percent chance like why did you pursue this? That’s a good question. So I feel like just changing my mindset. I feel like a lot of it had. I don’t know. I just my gut feeling that women intuition.

I just kind of like I feel like these are just numbers and a lot of times. Like being in the medical professional, sometimes these numbers can be skewed and, you know, it’s, they’re, they’re kind of off and so they’re not really good predictors sometimes. And so my gut feeling was just like. My body can do this.

Like, I just know my body could do this. And even though I wasn’t thinking that at the time where I was like, yeah, my mindset’s this, cause it really wasn’t like my mindset was very negative at that time, but it was that kind of woman’s intuition gut feeling that I was just like, no, I feel like my body is meant to conceive naturally and it’s going to do it.

And I don’t know how or when, or when it, when it’s going to happen and all that, but it was just that gut feeling. And then, like I said, it was just, and then. I feel like stumbling on your podcast and listening to everything and hearing other women’s stories as well, their past stories, and going through probably worse than what I went through, and then conceding naturally for them, I felt like that was very motivating as well.

So. I just, it was my mommy gut. I was meant to be a mom. well, so, okay. So you basically get into this place where you’re like, look, I, I’m going to look at my, this mindset thing. My gut’s telling me this is what I need. So what did you start noticing in you though, when you started doing the work? What were some of the changes that you noticed in you?

I feel like I’ve noticed I had a little bit more self confidence. A lot, because most of the time I never really, and I never really thought about it. I thought I did, but I felt like I didn’t have it to the degree that I should have it. And I noticed basically just changing the way I would think about things.

I remember one of your exercises or one of the podcasts that you had, it was just kind of like, you know, kind of don’t limit yourself. I mean, it was like that with the whole like money thing. And now you’re just kind of like, Hey, you know, don’t feel like, Oh, I can’t. Spend money on this because I have to like save it.

And I can’t think about things in the future. You’re just kind of just like, just let everything go and just like, do it. Like, I think that was one of your exercises. Just don’t think, just do it. And, you know, and I think that’s what happened was I just like, was like, you know what, I’m just going to do what I want to do.

I didn’t, I don’t think I put myself first, a lot of times I put other people first and I feel like, yeah, that’s, that’s just kind of a big, big lesson that you taught me. And also I was going to say with that whole thing was like, I think it was during that time we ended up just like buying a house. So yeah, it was funny because we walked in and I was like, I love it.

I want it. And. I’m in this new mindset where we’re like, we’re not going to just, we’re just going to let go and do it. Granted. I know we’ve got to be responsible in that sense to make sure it was fine, but obviously it was for us. And so we just sort of like, yeah, we did it. I was like, this is where I see, you know, I was kind of being using more picturing more of the future.

And so I was like, I feel like this house is meant to have, this is where we’re meant to have like babies. Like, this is like our current house. Where we were meant to be, but this one, I feel like I can see ourselves, like kid running around. We have more open space for her to be playing her or him to be playing at the time.

And so, yeah, I feel like it’s just my whole mindset just like changed in that sense where I was being more confident and being more free to do things. And also just, I don’t know, just like kind of. Yeah, like I said, putting myself first, which I never did. I mean, imagine that because you put other people first day in and day out for a living.

That’s just what you do, right? Exactly. And isn’t it funny that we somehow tell ourselves that putting ourselves last or not doing the thing that we want to do, that’s. Like responsible. We don’t ever think that, Hey, what if it’s the most responsible thing ever for me to actually go for what I say that I want?

What if that’s actually the responsible thing? Exactly. Yeah, I know. And a lot of times it’s. People don’t think that, you know, and I feel like, yeah, like you said, in my profession and even like in life, you know, I’m always like everybody like put a lot of things first. And my husband even pointed that out where it was like, you need to like do things for you sometimes.

And it was like, yeah, I do actually. Like where there, it’s like doing a little bit of like meditation in the morning, which that’s actually what I started to do kind of listening and doing the program with, it was just kind of, I think it was the last. The toolbox, the last one in your, your program. And it was just like having the schedule to routinely do things every day.

And I, that’s what I did. Like I meditated every day and I just kept telling myself, I get pregnant naturally and all this like self confidence and I can do this and everything. So I found a bunch of different meditations that I was like, no, I’m putting aside at least 10, 15 minutes to myself before I start my day.

And I was very much structured to that. And I think that’s what kind of helped me be as. because I felt like prior to this, my life was very chaotic and it was like, yep, work came first, family is next, my friends. And it was like, I just, there was barely time for me to time at all. And then he felt care or anything like that.

So, um, wow. Well, so, okay. So you’re, you’re doing this, you’re doing this program, you’re feeling better. You know, when did things Start turning around for you because something pretty miraculous happened for you. So why don’t you walk us through that? Definitely. So, um, let’s see. Exciting. I believe I’ve started, I think your program started for me, I think it was like August.

2021. I believe. Yeah. So I remember we were on our Lake Tahoe trip and that’s when I like spoke with you and everything there, but yeah, so that’s when kind of things started happening. So doing the, I think after I finished your program, that’s when things start to kind of change where I was like, all right, like I’m going to, you know, like I said, take time for myself every day to do my, my meditation, do my journaling.

And do some of the exercise, even repeating some of the exercises that you were doing every week, you know? So, you know, I would do them every week and then it was like, okay, programs over, but I would still continue to practice and do what you were kind of saying, like journaling, you know, I had my bump squad stuff and it was like, you know, taking, like having support from friends and it was kind of good.

I mean, and actually being open more to talk to people about kind of what was going on in my life, because I think I was more closed in where I was like, I didn’t want. People to know that I had an issue getting pregnant or what was going on with my body and everything like that. But I started to get more comfortable and confident about kind of telling people what’s going on and all that.

And so it making changes and not being very stubborn to it. Cause I am very, I am a very stubborn person. You can ask my husband sometimes. So I think I became more open minded and just had this different mindset and being more positive and everything. And just giving myself that confidence to say, yeah, like you can.

You know, get pregnant and can do this on your own and don’t stress out too much about it. And so, and every time I would find myself stressed about things, you know, I would turn back to just doing like the journal stuff. And I think the biggest thing was like holding on to a lot of stuff in the past that I feel like was probably another thing as well.

So I think the best exercise or one of actually all the exercises were pretty good, but the best one I really liked was kind of writing those letters to forgive. People in your life and kind of move past it and move on. So I feel like mentally that definitely helped with everything and, and, and kind of getting me into this better mindset.

So yeah, and it’s crazy cause people overlook it. And I feel like that’s, you know, a big thing. And I mean, not just getting pregnant just for any everyday life, you know, it was having a better mindset on life. And, and I feel like that this whole thing that’s changed. Kind of happened to me, changed my mindset, but it also, and I’m just happy that it’s also, you know, moving forward, I have a different mindset ongoing.

So yeah. So now, okay, because I remember you sent me an email, like it was hilarious because I remember, Pauline, Oh my gosh, you know, like What, you know, what is she sending? I remember I saw your name in, in my account and I like clicked it and you’re like, um, you know, like, so like talk to us about the lead up for that because, cause what you’re describing and, and this is, you know, because you’re such a humble and generous person, it’s easy for you to kind of like leave out some of the struggle, right?

Because you’re like, oh, it’s just what I do. I just, you know, I take these lessons, I apply them, you know, and then here I am. But you had to have kept on trying, like there’s a part of you that was like making all these changes, starting to put yourself first, communicating more, sharing with people what was going on, doing the forgiveness and moving through that.

So tell us about this lead up to this gorgeous miracle baby, because I cannot wait to hear the full story. Yep. So we basically just spent that whole time leading up to like, Not caring kind of just being like, you know, what if it doesn’t happen, we’ll be dog parents for the rest of our lives. We’re not going to stress about it.

So we ended up just kind of taking our vacations and Putting ourselves first and just doing what we wanted to do. And so yeah, it was crazy So we we did more golfing. My husband and I are both golfers. So we spent time golfing hiking and just I changed up my diet as well. Like I, I kind of was like, well, you know, I’m going to just kind of work on other things as well.

And so changed up our diets and we just all, we just kind of had just both felt so good. Like we both were on this journey together and it kind of, and it helps you to have a stuff that was just on this journey with me. And so, yeah, so we, we took our vacations. We kind of just like letting go, we were just kind of being free spirited, I guess, in a sense for the past, uh, those few months leading up to things.

And then, um, yeah, and we just, what else was that? Golfed. And then we, oh yeah, and that was the other thing was my funny story was that the month before we were going, it was a couple months before we conceived creative golfing and there was a golf ball that was. I was in the sand and I went and I picked it up and it said Leo on it.

And so I was like, Oh, that’s the name. Like, and that was the name I wanted to always do a baby was Leo. Which is crazy. Leo or Liam. Yeah. So I was like, yeah, I was like, so it means we’re going to have a baby soon. So I picked it up and I showed my husband and I still have the golf ball to this day. I probably should go grab it.

But, but yeah, it’s orange golf balls with Leo on it. And I was like, I think this was a sign. And I was like, you’re crazy. Like, it’s fine. Like, no, it’s not. So we picked it up. I was like, all right, well, I’m just going to keep it. And so it may be silly, but I felt like that was like my, my sign of like, okay, things are going to happen.

Things are going to turn around from here. And then, yeah. And so then I kept continuing to doing my, my, my journaling, my mindset stuff, all that good stuff, meditating. Exercising, eating right and everything like that. And so I think I was just like, one morning I was just like, well, before work, like 5am in the morning, I was just kind of like, well, you know, I don’t know, I don’t feel like, I just kind of feel like I need to take a test.

There was no real grief. I was just kind of like, nah, I know it’s going to be, it’s probably going to be negative and it’s going to be okay because. Back for this whole mindset, working on myself, stuff that’s going on, it’d be like negative pregnancy tests. I’d be bursting into tears. My whole day would be ruined, all that stuff.

So I was like, I’m just going to try it and just see, and you know, if it’s not pregnant, then it’s okay. Like things will move on and keep trying and just have a good time. We’re just going to do that. So, you know, obviously he done my stick and there was a little faint line. I know. It was these cheap little.

Pregnancy sticks I bought off of Amazon was like five bucks or something. And I was like, Oh, this is right. So then I was like, I’ll just wait and take another test, like maybe tomorrow. And so then I took another test and then the line was a little bit more. You can sit a little bit better. And so I was like, all right, I’m just going to splurge on like the more expensive desk.

And then, um, yeah. And so I was like, I’m just going to do it. And then I ended up doing that. And it says, and I was just like, wait, what is it was like in our bathroom? Like 4 a. m. in the morning, like, that’s when I would probably do the test and everything, and I was just like, what, like, am I really, like, is this real, or, you know, I don’t, I don’t know what to say, and so I just was like, it was, I was just in shock, because I was like, I don’t think, I feel like I got to wait a little bit longer.

So I ended up, there’s this lab test place that you can go to and just get whatever lab tests you want. I’m knowing me, my, my science brain and everything. I was like, I, I feel like the urine test was probably off or something. So I went and got a lab test for my HCG levels and it was like. They were climbing and so I was like, all right, I think this is good.

So then I didn’t want to, you know, get my husband’s hopes up because I remember we got our hopes up with the whole one egg kind of like going to the blast with the stage and all that good stuff. So I didn’t want to get his hopes up and I wanted to wait a little bit longer, but then I couldn’t. And so usually I’m known for bringing home sweets from work because our patients like to give us cookies and all that stuff.

And so then I, I got a little onesie. Um, it says our next, uh, our next adventure begins and then put the little pregnancy tests in there and on top of the onesie in this little box. It looked like a little cake box. So I come home, I was like, Oh, I got a surprise. And he’s just like, wait, what are you like, what are you talking about?

I was like, I got like someone brought a cake to the clinic and, you know, I probably should have done better. I should have put something else heavier in it. But he was just like, why is it so light? Like it’s a cake. Like it should be a little bit heavier. So then he opens it and he’s just like. No way. I was like, yes, like, this is real.

And he was like, you’re, you’re lying. I was like, no. And then I took out all the other three pregnancies out of those, like, these were all positive. I took the blood test and yeah, so yeah, and uh, the rest is history. So then I was getting pregnant and, and, and it came at, and you know, it kind of, I’m really a little bit spiritual in a sense where I feel like.

So we lost his brother like a month or actually like a couple of weeks before we conceived. So I felt like this was his gift from his brother that passed away. So yeah, it was kind of a lot going on. So that kind of led up to all this. And yeah, so we were like, well, you know, it was, it was definitely a rollercoaster year last year with that we had a death in the family.

And then it was like. But then we just had, we conceived our first baby finally and yeah, so, but yeah, very grateful. But we just felt like spiritually both like that when we’re like, you know what, I feel like this was our gift after he left the world. So after my husband’s brother left the world, so yeah, so it was crazy.

But other than that, we, we got pregnant and pregnancy was great and now we have our little baby girl and she’s just precious. So So, so I, you’re here, you basically went from. Like, endometriosis, low AMH, low egg reserve, two eggs retrieved during your first IVF cycle, only, like, being told that one made it, but then not really because nothing was there, like it didn’t make it, to deciding you weren’t going to do IVF.

It wasn’t right for you. Starting this crazy mindset journey, trusting your gut and starting to work the system. And then, and you started in August of 2021 and you have a nine month old daughter now. So basically within a year of working on mindset, despite being told you had a 1% chance, less than 1% chance of natural, yeah, less than one.

Less than 1 percent chance of conceiving naturally. You now have a nine month old daughter. Yes, that is so true. And I would not have if you would have told me that back in the day that this was all happening. I would not have believed any of that. I’m like so crazy. What’s this mindset you’re talking about?

So I mean, it’s incredible. I mean, you know, it always interests me because it would have. That’s why I ask this question all the time. Like, what was it that made you trust yourself? Because You could have had that maternal, you know, that mama feeling that you were saying that mother knowing that, Hey, my body can do this.

And I think at some level we all have that, but I think very few people trust that. Like are willing to take the leap and trust that because dude, when we’re typically told we have 1 percent chance of success, we pretty much figure it’s over and it’s a gangster move for you to do what you did. What do you think drove you to trust that?

Because it’s one thing to hear the voice, Pauline saying my body can do this, but it’s another to believe it’s possible and trust that. So what do you think the trust was in you? Like, where did that come from? Oh, man, that’s a good question. Well, I mean, I feel like, sorry, I’m like thinking about it. Cause I’m like, I’m trying to think back.

Cause it was so long ago. What was my, I just felt like, no, I was able to overcome a lot of things in the past and. I was like, we’re not going into this whole history of my stuff, but, um, but just kind of, you know, like I was just kind of a go getter in that sense where I was like, you know what? I went through, you know, high school doing all those things and I’m in college and everything.

And I put myself through and I was always a go getter and I was just like, you know what? I’m going to do it. When I put my mind to it, I’m going to do it. And I felt like my competitive mind as well was just kind of like, no, like we’re going to beat the odds here. And. I’m not gonna listen to About this doctor.

I mean granted. It’s like yes, I respect his opinions and everything, but I felt like you know that’s just not me like i’m Competitive and i’m gonna do we’re gonna do this like somehow some way and I just yeah It was that that feeling and I guess, you know, just having that confidence to just be like, you know what, we’re my body can do it.

And yeah, I don’t have a hard question to answer. I’m just like, I don’t know what kind of turns for me there where it was like, I’m just gonna not think about what the statistics were. So yeah, I just like I said, like my gut feelings always usually right. I feel like it’s that women’s intuition. Yeah. I’m like, I don’t know what to say.

She was like, I just knew in my mind and my gut, but it was just all like, no, this is going to happen. And, you know, and granted it to kind of help my mom, she’s kind of a spiritual lady as well. And she was saying like, she’s like, oh, it’s, it’s going to happen naturally. You just wait, like you just wait, you know, you got mom or two.

I mean, yeah. Which was great. Yeah. You know, and, and having had the distinct honor. Of being by your side in this process, Pauline, I would offer an additional explanation because watching you and I remember, you know, this, that negativity you’re talking about, you wanted to succeed more than you wanted your fear.

And, and that’s essentially another way of saying what you just said, because. You’re a gangster, you’re a go getter, you’re not somebody that takes no for an answer, but you wanted to make this dream come true more than you wanted to stay safe, trapped in your fear, and obedient. Because you’re a gangster lady, you’re not obedient to shit, you know, and you’re not going to just obey when somebody says, yeah, pretty much give up on your dream, the only way it’s going to happen is with, you know, Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Yeah. Yeah, wait, that’s not gangster of me at all. Well, so now, what would the you of today? So as somebody, a living, breathing, actual non AI individual who has experienced this journey, what would you say to the women listening who may also be facing single digit or less odds? What would you want them to know?

I definitely would want you all to know That never give up, it’s possible, just keep your mindset, keep your eye on the prize, your mind in the game, your head in the game, definitely there were some ups and downs in my journey, I probably didn’t share too many details about it, but you know, like your things will be met, will happen for you, and just keep thinking that, and don’t stray away from whatever your mindset is for your goal to be a mom, because yeah.

You’re gonna be a mom and you’re gonna and it’s and it’s wonderful and it’s worth the wait and it’s worth the journey So I know it’s so cliche to say it just don’t give up on your dreams But really don’t just don’t give up just like what Roseanne sadly you want you get your be a go getter Be gangster.

No, like don’t give up on anything Don’t let anybody else tell you throw all these numbers at you and all that stuff just just ignore it and just kind of go forward and And just have confidence in yourself because you’re meant to be a mom and, and it’s wonderful and it’s going to happen for you. So, yes.

That’s so good, Polly. Well, you know, I’m so, so honored to have you on and I’m so grateful for your generosity here because So much changed for you. I mean, I thank you so much for sharing that golf ball story. That’s like the coolest thing ever. I’m like, I still have it in my bag. I’m like, I’m not going to use it.

Yeah. It’s crazy. Well, I mean, think about it. I mean, because it’s really easy to be such and you know, it’s funny. I observed this in people. Sometimes sometimes people find so much certainty in the science, but here’s the deal. The science is one part of it, but it’s not all of it. There were signs coming at you and think about who you had to become.

In order to look at an orange golf ball and know that shit was your sign, girl. Exactly. I know. Isn’t that funny? My husband was like, are you, like, what is going on with you? I’m like, blame Roseanne. She has me in this different mindset. And everything happens for a reason. And yeah, so. I will take full responsibility for being the facilitator in that if, if there, if I will be so, I’m so happy for that because what you ended up doing was believing in yourself and the possibility more than you believed in the fear, Pauline.

And if that’s what put that beautiful baby girl in your hands, hey. Start seeing all kinds of crazy shit all around you because there’s only more good coming for you. So Man, well, thank you so much. Love. Thank you so much for sharing and being so generous with the women listening I know that what you’ve shared here is not only going to inspire it is certainly going to help change lives And call lives in.

So thank you so much, Pauline. We love you. We’re going to be praying for you and your family. Thank you so much for sharing with us. Thank you so much for everything. I love you so much. My loves, if you have dry eyes, you need to go back and listen to this. I mean, wasn’t the golf ball story like crazy? I mean, didn’t that just get your heart a leaping and believing in your baby and the signs that are coming for you?

Look, as I said at the very beginning of this podcast, I know that Pauline would tell you that if she did it, so can you. So if you are in a place. Where you just know that this baby is meant for you and you just need to get out of your own way. It’s time to learn what I taught Pauline. My Fearlessly Fertile Method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say hell yes to covering their bases, mind and body.

So you don’t have to look back on this time in your life with regret. Look what Pauline did and look how quickly she did it. I work with women who are committed to success. To apply for your interview for this program, go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodology, as you heard yourself, is help women around the world make their mom dreams come true.

Their results speak for themselves. And look, mama, if you don’t have a mindset for success in this journey, baby, you have a gaping hole in your strategy. You’re missing a huge opportunity here. Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success. Till next time, change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of the Fearlessly Fertile Podcast?

Subscribe now and leave an awesome review. Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

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A “geriatric” medical professional with her endometriosis in full swing and low AMH, Pauline was told that she had at best a 1% chance of conceiving. She responded “poorly” to IVF with just 2 eggs retrieved–neither made it to blastocyst. That’s when Pauline and I met. You will hear that Pauline went from being a “poor responder,” to getting and staying pregnant naturally within MONTHS. Learn the gangster moves that this Miracle Mama made to call in her precious girl. If you need a strong shot of faith and more reasons to believe in yourself AND your body, you will LOVE what Pauline has to share. AND don’t miss her “golf-ball” story!

Want the journal page that goes with this episode? CLICK HERE

Transcript:
Hey Gorgeous. If you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, fertility mindset master, former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.

It’s time to get fearless baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile podcast episode 242. From endo, low AMH and a 1 percent chance to pregnant naturally. Pauline’s story. Hey, loves. Ooh, I got a doozy for you this week. Oh, you are gonna fall in love with Pauline. Don’t you just love all of these women?

Like, it’s just crazy. So kind, so generous, sharing their stories to lift all of us up on this journey is so good. And I bet it’s pretty obvious to you why I, I just leap out of bed in the morning because I get to work with these women, just so committed, so big hearted, so loving, they keep their word, they do the work, and they follow through, they stay focused on the dream.

I mean, I just Oh, I just can’t get enough of this. And you’re going to just fall in love with Pauline because with her endometriosis in full swing and low AMH, Pauline was told that she had at best a 1 percent chance of conceiving. She had tried IVF. They told her that was going to be the only way. She was a poor responder.

She got just two eggs retrieved. And neither made it to Blastocyst. And at that point, Pauline had a choice to make. And she did something incredibly gangster. And I cannot wait for you to hear her share her testimony in her own words. Because she did something that most women would not. She did a full pivot.

And she ended up calling in this beautiful baby of hers. In a way, they told her it was probably not going to happen, and she did it in record time. It’s truly extraordinary. So I hope that you will turn this one up. If you have been told something crazy about your body, told that you have a less than 1 percent chance, I mean, look, my ladies routinely beat 1 percent odds, like left and right.

All you have to do is scroll through the list of podcasts to hear that, to know it’s true. So, If you’re in a place where you’re really struggling because of your diagnosis or whatever the case may be, pay close attention to what Pauline is going to share because I assure you, she would tell you that if she could do it, so can you.

So here is my conversation with Miracle Mama, Pauline. Woman, we’re gonna just jump straight in because this is a conversation I have been looking forward to having for a long time. Thank you. That’s fine with me. Well, so why don’t you start off by just sharing with the women listening, like how did you find yourself on this journey?

And then how did we meet? Yeah, definitely. So my dream began. So I was diagnosed with endometriosis in my early twenties. It happened to be just kind of a coincidental finding when I got an ID placed, so they removed the cyst and then biopsied it and then ended up finding that I had endometriosis. So I was like, okay, no big deal.

And then my twenties, I don’t care at that point, right? So yeah, so then flash forward to maybe, I think it was like maybe three, 34, 33, around there. Yeah, I met my husband and we decided we wanted to have a baby together. So, you know, we were trying and then I already kind of knew, I was like, well, I know endometriosis is kind of hard stuff.

Um, to conceive a baby when you do have that. So I was already like, you know what? We probably need to see a specialist for this. So I was already like on the game for that. So we went to, actually one of my friends recommended a clinic that was in, um, Colorado or down in Denver. And so we ended up meeting with the doc there and just kind of talking about everything and, and yeah, so he was like, well, let’s just run some tests and see kind of like where we’re at on things and all that good stuff.

And so. I remember I was working, I remember the exact same time where I was working, and then ended up reading my lab results, and so I’m just like Googling all these things, because I’m like, I don’t know what all these tests mean. So then I go to the AMH portion of it and it was super, super low. It was like, I think 0.

16, I think. So I was just kind of like, I don’t know what that means. And so looking it up, it was like, basically I have like. Very low egg reserve, so I was freaking out a little bit about that, so then we ended up going back into meeting with the doc again, and he basically was saying, like, your chances of conceding naturally is probably like less than 1%, giving your, your, yeah, I was just like, what?

At that point, I was just like, well, I didn’t know really how to take the news. I was just kind of like, it should be fine. But yeah, but he told me straight up, it was just like less than 1 percent your age. Cause you know, I’m a geriatric pregnant, it would be. So he was like, yeah. So he’s just like, well, your age and you know, you have endometriosis, your animation is very, very low.

So, you know, it’s least likely you’re going to be, you’re going to get like, get pregnant naturally. So, my husband, or my fiancee at this point, so he went back and we’re like, you know what, let’s just try, like, we haven’t gotten married yet, let’s just kind of get the marriage, the wedding stuff out of the way, and then we’ll kind of start there.

So, instead of like going straight into IVF, because obviously after that, he was like, you need to do IVF, like, that’s the only way you’re going to get pregnant is through IVF. And so Yeah, so we got married and granted it was during COVID of course, so we had to postpone our wedding. So we were supposed to get married in June and then we had to postpone the wedding until September and so after that we started trying and I think we were trying for about like maybe a good four or five months and then I was kind of like, you know what, maybe we do need to do like, yeah, if everybody, all my friends around me, they were, everybody was getting pregnant left and right.

It was just like, why aren’t we getting pregnant? Like what’s happening here? So. So I decided to be like, all right, let’s just go back in. Let’s just do a round of the IVF. Maybe that’s just what we need. So yes, we went in, talked to the doc, and then we got everything started with the IVF, which was the most terrible process.

So I give a lot of credit to a lot of women who’ve done this more than once. Um, one time was like, what had done was kind of my, my thoughts there, because the shots were terrible, kills, the timing of everything. So Yeah, so we ended up doing one round of IBS and I just remember when they were doing the harvesting of my eggs, the egg collection, I remember I only had two eggs that they collected and it was so heartbreaking because I remember, I’m sorry to interrupt a little bit, I remember when I was like sitting in the little like Postop area.

And you know, they don’t have, like, it’s not a private room, obviously. There’s just like curtains and you can just, you know, you can hear the other like people coming in from after they, what? When they got their eggs collected and everything like that. And so the lady next to me, they’re like, oh, you got like eggs.

And then the lady, the lady next on the other side was like 20 eggs. And I was like, oh. And so they said, they write down like, excuse me. They write down, you know, how many eggs you got, and I looked down at my hand, and it was like two, and we’re like, oh, so then we have like a really small percent chance to get pregnant, if these are even viable, and so, you know, they go, they incubate it, they do all the good stuff with that, so we get a call the next day from the lab, and they’re like, well, one egg didn’t make it into the blastocyst stage and everything, so we used to have one that actually made it, so we’re super excited, we’re Yes, like this probably is the one and everything and so they’re like, well, we wouldn’t, we won’t call you for the next until like maybe five days later and then we can let you know if it’s, if it’s survived and if we can, if it’s developing into an embryo and all that stuff.

And so, yeah, so we were like, okay, cool. So we were all excited about it. And I remember driving into work and they called me like about 15 hours. Yeah. So didn’t make it. So. Sorry, and that was it. I was like, all right, great. So I have to go into work, like just feeling just like super defeated and just like, what are we going to do now?

Like it’s all my fault, like with everything going on. And my husband was great through all of this. Like never blame me for anything. He was like, you know, whatever you want to do, it’s up to you. So anyway, so we go back to this reproductive doctor and he. Tells me, like, you know, IVF didn’t work for you, I mean, we could do another round, but, I mean, most likely it’s not gonna work for you, so let’s just move to donor eggs, like, right now, and so, he’s giving me all these numbers and statistics, like, you know, this is, like, if you do get pregnant, like, these are the chances, like, there can be some abnormalities and all this stuff going on, so, I remember just crying in the office, just like, oh my gosh, and he’s just kind of looking at me, like, kind of, you know, it is what it is, like, Just let me know if you want to do another round of IVF.

Then he just left. So then my husband and I left the office and, and then my husband just looks at me and he’s just like, you know what? Like it’s up to you. It’s your body. If you want to do a second round, fine, we can do it. But if you don’t want to put yourself through that, I’ve been watching you put yourself through the shots and all that stuff.

And so, yeah, it’s up to you. We don’t have to do another round. And so it’s like, fine. Yeah. Like, let’s just. You know, I was like, let’s just sleep on it. We’ll see. I don’t know if I want to do that again as well. So then I ended up just like going hardcore looking at. Different diets, all these different things to do to kind of help increase my chances of getting naturally.

I’m listening to all these podcasts and all of a sudden with a funny, probably like that funny, like algorithm Facebook does, but your podcast popped up onto my feed. And I was like, Oh, like this lady looks kind of like, it was the pink hair you had at the time, the pink and the black. So I was like, Oh yeah, she’s my style.

Like I liked her style, so I’m just going to listen to her because all the other podcasts I was listening to, granted, they were very informational, but you know, it was very like, I don’t know, it wasn’t something that I needed, like advice wise. So I just wasn’t clicking for me. So yeah, so I ended up stumbling across your podcast and the rest is history.

I just was listening to it and I was just like, like blown away by how real you were with everything. And just kind of like. Napping yourself out of this rut and just like telling people how to like get your shit together. This is like, you know, all the stuff you got to do and kind of work on yourself.

And I ended up buying your book as well, which also turned me on. So just being like, all right, I feel like I need to just sign up for her class. And I just, I think that was the best investment that I’ve ever done. Oh yeah. I forgot to also mention when I was on this, like fertility journey, you know, I was doing, I think I did, I did.

So much acupuncture, which was great, but they were also making me drink like these weird herbs and stuff. And I remember your story with like going to Chinatown and getting the black chicken or something like that. I was like, I didn’t get that extreme, but yeah. So I felt like I did so many things, but then coming across your, your podcast.

And then, yeah, that, that’s just kind of how I ended up finding you. And I’m so grateful to this day because. Yeah, I have a, a lovely little nine month old actually in a couple of days. And so yeah, and it’s the best thing ever being a mom is just so amazing. So yeah, that’s, that’s my journey to you Rosie and so, and I just, man, it’s so interesting to me because, well, first of all, I have to ask you this question because.

You remember when we first met, you remember when we had our first conversation, did you ever imagine what it would be like to have this conversation? Did you ever imagine that you would go from being a listener to this podcast, then go into the program and then now being a guest? Not at all. I was not even thinking it.

I was just like, no, I mean, it’s not, it’s not gonna happen. And that was the thing, was like my thought, my whole thought process back then was so negative and I was like, eh, I’m not gonna make it. And I’m just hearing all these women are like, my goal is to get on the podcast and that never was my goal.

But I was like, you know what? That is gonna be my goal. Like I’m gonna get on this podcast. But yes, I would not have imagined, like if you would have told me this, like, Two years ago, I’d have been like, you’re crazy. Like, have you seen the statistic? Have you seen the statistics and the numbers? Like, no, I’m never going to get this right.

Well, I mean, so let’s dive into that because I love, well, and you’re, you’re in medicine. So you understand, like you probably understand more than most people what the statistics are saying. Right? Like, to be told by somebody in a white coat, for better or worse, right? That, A, you got a less than 1 percent chance of conceiving naturally.

Like, your whole world can be like, Bwaaah! You know, like, you can Because that sounds basically like it’s not happening. Right. So, so what made you as a medical professional, like want to look in this mindset area? Because you, Pauline, you could have easily said, you know what? That sounds like fine. Her podcast is maybe a little funny and it’s kind of kick ass, but like, why would I do that and do this program knowing what I know?

Because tons of women. Are thinking that way like I don’t need this because you know what the doctors already told me I have a less than 1 percent chance like why did you pursue this? That’s a good question. So I feel like just changing my mindset. I feel like a lot of it had. I don’t know. I just my gut feeling that women intuition.

I just kind of like I feel like these are just numbers and a lot of times. Like being in the medical professional, sometimes these numbers can be skewed and, you know, it’s, they’re, they’re kind of off and so they’re not really good predictors sometimes. And so my gut feeling was just like. My body can do this.

Like, I just know my body could do this. And even though I wasn’t thinking that at the time where I was like, yeah, my mindset’s this, cause it really wasn’t like my mindset was very negative at that time, but it was that kind of woman’s intuition gut feeling that I was just like, no, I feel like my body is meant to conceive naturally and it’s going to do it.

And I don’t know how or when, or when it, when it’s going to happen and all that, but it was just that gut feeling. And then, like I said, it was just, and then. I feel like stumbling on your podcast and listening to everything and hearing other women’s stories as well, their past stories, and going through probably worse than what I went through, and then conceding naturally for them, I felt like that was very motivating as well.

So. I just, it was my mommy gut. I was meant to be a mom. well, so, okay. So you basically get into this place where you’re like, look, I, I’m going to look at my, this mindset thing. My gut’s telling me this is what I need. So what did you start noticing in you though, when you started doing the work? What were some of the changes that you noticed in you?

I feel like I’ve noticed I had a little bit more self confidence. A lot, because most of the time I never really, and I never really thought about it. I thought I did, but I felt like I didn’t have it to the degree that I should have it. And I noticed basically just changing the way I would think about things.

I remember one of your exercises or one of the podcasts that you had, it was just kind of like, you know, kind of don’t limit yourself. I mean, it was like that with the whole like money thing. And now you’re just kind of like, Hey, you know, don’t feel like, Oh, I can’t. Spend money on this because I have to like save it.

And I can’t think about things in the future. You’re just kind of just like, just let everything go and just like, do it. Like, I think that was one of your exercises. Just don’t think, just do it. And, you know, and I think that’s what happened was I just like, was like, you know what, I’m just going to do what I want to do.

I didn’t, I don’t think I put myself first, a lot of times I put other people first and I feel like, yeah, that’s, that’s just kind of a big, big lesson that you taught me. And also I was going to say with that whole thing was like, I think it was during that time we ended up just like buying a house. So yeah, it was funny because we walked in and I was like, I love it.

I want it. And. I’m in this new mindset where we’re like, we’re not going to just, we’re just going to let go and do it. Granted. I know we’ve got to be responsible in that sense to make sure it was fine, but obviously it was for us. And so we just sort of like, yeah, we did it. I was like, this is where I see, you know, I was kind of being using more picturing more of the future.

And so I was like, I feel like this house is meant to have, this is where we’re meant to have like babies. Like, this is like our current house. Where we were meant to be, but this one, I feel like I can see ourselves, like kid running around. We have more open space for her to be playing her or him to be playing at the time.

And so, yeah, I feel like it’s just my whole mindset just like changed in that sense where I was being more confident and being more free to do things. And also just, I don’t know, just like kind of. Yeah, like I said, putting myself first, which I never did. I mean, imagine that because you put other people first day in and day out for a living.

That’s just what you do, right? Exactly. And isn’t it funny that we somehow tell ourselves that putting ourselves last or not doing the thing that we want to do, that’s. Like responsible. We don’t ever think that, Hey, what if it’s the most responsible thing ever for me to actually go for what I say that I want?

What if that’s actually the responsible thing? Exactly. Yeah, I know. And a lot of times it’s. People don’t think that, you know, and I feel like, yeah, like you said, in my profession and even like in life, you know, I’m always like everybody like put a lot of things first. And my husband even pointed that out where it was like, you need to like do things for you sometimes.

And it was like, yeah, I do actually. Like where there, it’s like doing a little bit of like meditation in the morning, which that’s actually what I started to do kind of listening and doing the program with, it was just kind of, I think it was the last. The toolbox, the last one in your, your program. And it was just like having the schedule to routinely do things every day.

And I, that’s what I did. Like I meditated every day and I just kept telling myself, I get pregnant naturally and all this like self confidence and I can do this and everything. So I found a bunch of different meditations that I was like, no, I’m putting aside at least 10, 15 minutes to myself before I start my day.

And I was very much structured to that. And I think that’s what kind of helped me be as. because I felt like prior to this, my life was very chaotic and it was like, yep, work came first, family is next, my friends. And it was like, I just, there was barely time for me to time at all. And then he felt care or anything like that.

So, um, wow. Well, so, okay. So you’re, you’re doing this, you’re doing this program, you’re feeling better. You know, when did things Start turning around for you because something pretty miraculous happened for you. So why don’t you walk us through that? Definitely. So, um, let’s see. Exciting. I believe I’ve started, I think your program started for me, I think it was like August.

2021. I believe. Yeah. So I remember we were on our Lake Tahoe trip and that’s when I like spoke with you and everything there, but yeah, so that’s when kind of things started happening. So doing the, I think after I finished your program, that’s when things start to kind of change where I was like, all right, like I’m going to, you know, like I said, take time for myself every day to do my, my meditation, do my journaling.

And do some of the exercise, even repeating some of the exercises that you were doing every week, you know? So, you know, I would do them every week and then it was like, okay, programs over, but I would still continue to practice and do what you were kind of saying, like journaling, you know, I had my bump squad stuff and it was like, you know, taking, like having support from friends and it was kind of good.

I mean, and actually being open more to talk to people about kind of what was going on in my life, because I think I was more closed in where I was like, I didn’t want. People to know that I had an issue getting pregnant or what was going on with my body and everything like that. But I started to get more comfortable and confident about kind of telling people what’s going on and all that.

And so it making changes and not being very stubborn to it. Cause I am very, I am a very stubborn person. You can ask my husband sometimes. So I think I became more open minded and just had this different mindset and being more positive and everything. And just giving myself that confidence to say, yeah, like you can.

You know, get pregnant and can do this on your own and don’t stress out too much about it. And so, and every time I would find myself stressed about things, you know, I would turn back to just doing like the journal stuff. And I think the biggest thing was like holding on to a lot of stuff in the past that I feel like was probably another thing as well.

So I think the best exercise or one of actually all the exercises were pretty good, but the best one I really liked was kind of writing those letters to forgive. People in your life and kind of move past it and move on. So I feel like mentally that definitely helped with everything and, and, and kind of getting me into this better mindset.

So yeah, and it’s crazy cause people overlook it. And I feel like that’s, you know, a big thing. And I mean, not just getting pregnant just for any everyday life, you know, it was having a better mindset on life. And, and I feel like that this whole thing that’s changed. Kind of happened to me, changed my mindset, but it also, and I’m just happy that it’s also, you know, moving forward, I have a different mindset ongoing.

So yeah. So now, okay, because I remember you sent me an email, like it was hilarious because I remember, Pauline, Oh my gosh, you know, like What, you know, what is she sending? I remember I saw your name in, in my account and I like clicked it and you’re like, um, you know, like, so like talk to us about the lead up for that because, cause what you’re describing and, and this is, you know, because you’re such a humble and generous person, it’s easy for you to kind of like leave out some of the struggle, right?

Because you’re like, oh, it’s just what I do. I just, you know, I take these lessons, I apply them, you know, and then here I am. But you had to have kept on trying, like there’s a part of you that was like making all these changes, starting to put yourself first, communicating more, sharing with people what was going on, doing the forgiveness and moving through that.

So tell us about this lead up to this gorgeous miracle baby, because I cannot wait to hear the full story. Yep. So we basically just spent that whole time leading up to like, Not caring kind of just being like, you know, what if it doesn’t happen, we’ll be dog parents for the rest of our lives. We’re not going to stress about it.

So we ended up just kind of taking our vacations and Putting ourselves first and just doing what we wanted to do. And so yeah, it was crazy So we we did more golfing. My husband and I are both golfers. So we spent time golfing hiking and just I changed up my diet as well. Like I, I kind of was like, well, you know, I’m going to just kind of work on other things as well.

And so changed up our diets and we just all, we just kind of had just both felt so good. Like we both were on this journey together and it kind of, and it helps you to have a stuff that was just on this journey with me. And so, yeah, so we, we took our vacations. We kind of just like letting go, we were just kind of being free spirited, I guess, in a sense for the past, uh, those few months leading up to things.

And then, um, yeah, and we just, what else was that? Golfed. And then we, oh yeah, and that was the other thing was my funny story was that the month before we were going, it was a couple months before we conceived creative golfing and there was a golf ball that was. I was in the sand and I went and I picked it up and it said Leo on it.

And so I was like, Oh, that’s the name. Like, and that was the name I wanted to always do a baby was Leo. Which is crazy. Leo or Liam. Yeah. So I was like, yeah, I was like, so it means we’re going to have a baby soon. So I picked it up and I showed my husband and I still have the golf ball to this day. I probably should go grab it.

But, but yeah, it’s orange golf balls with Leo on it. And I was like, I think this was a sign. And I was like, you’re crazy. Like, it’s fine. Like, no, it’s not. So we picked it up. I was like, all right, well, I’m just going to keep it. And so it may be silly, but I felt like that was like my, my sign of like, okay, things are going to happen.

Things are going to turn around from here. And then, yeah. And so then I kept continuing to doing my, my, my journaling, my mindset stuff, all that good stuff, meditating. Exercising, eating right and everything like that. And so I think I was just like, one morning I was just like, well, before work, like 5am in the morning, I was just kind of like, well, you know, I don’t know, I don’t feel like, I just kind of feel like I need to take a test.

There was no real grief. I was just kind of like, nah, I know it’s going to be, it’s probably going to be negative and it’s going to be okay because. Back for this whole mindset, working on myself, stuff that’s going on, it’d be like negative pregnancy tests. I’d be bursting into tears. My whole day would be ruined, all that stuff.

So I was like, I’m just going to try it and just see, and you know, if it’s not pregnant, then it’s okay. Like things will move on and keep trying and just have a good time. We’re just going to do that. So, you know, obviously he done my stick and there was a little faint line. I know. It was these cheap little.

Pregnancy sticks I bought off of Amazon was like five bucks or something. And I was like, Oh, this is right. So then I was like, I’ll just wait and take another test, like maybe tomorrow. And so then I took another test and then the line was a little bit more. You can sit a little bit better. And so I was like, all right, I’m just going to splurge on like the more expensive desk.

And then, um, yeah. And so I was like, I’m just going to do it. And then I ended up doing that. And it says, and I was just like, wait, what is it was like in our bathroom? Like 4 a. m. in the morning, like, that’s when I would probably do the test and everything, and I was just like, what, like, am I really, like, is this real, or, you know, I don’t, I don’t know what to say, and so I just was like, it was, I was just in shock, because I was like, I don’t think, I feel like I got to wait a little bit longer.

So I ended up, there’s this lab test place that you can go to and just get whatever lab tests you want. I’m knowing me, my, my science brain and everything. I was like, I, I feel like the urine test was probably off or something. So I went and got a lab test for my HCG levels and it was like. They were climbing and so I was like, all right, I think this is good.

So then I didn’t want to, you know, get my husband’s hopes up because I remember we got our hopes up with the whole one egg kind of like going to the blast with the stage and all that good stuff. So I didn’t want to get his hopes up and I wanted to wait a little bit longer, but then I couldn’t. And so usually I’m known for bringing home sweets from work because our patients like to give us cookies and all that stuff.

And so then I, I got a little onesie. Um, it says our next, uh, our next adventure begins and then put the little pregnancy tests in there and on top of the onesie in this little box. It looked like a little cake box. So I come home, I was like, Oh, I got a surprise. And he’s just like, wait, what are you like, what are you talking about?

I was like, I got like someone brought a cake to the clinic and, you know, I probably should have done better. I should have put something else heavier in it. But he was just like, why is it so light? Like it’s a cake. Like it should be a little bit heavier. So then he opens it and he’s just like. No way. I was like, yes, like, this is real.

And he was like, you’re, you’re lying. I was like, no. And then I took out all the other three pregnancies out of those, like, these were all positive. I took the blood test and yeah, so yeah, and uh, the rest is history. So then I was getting pregnant and, and, and it came at, and you know, it kind of, I’m really a little bit spiritual in a sense where I feel like.

So we lost his brother like a month or actually like a couple of weeks before we conceived. So I felt like this was his gift from his brother that passed away. So yeah, it was kind of a lot going on. So that kind of led up to all this. And yeah, so we were like, well, you know, it was, it was definitely a rollercoaster year last year with that we had a death in the family.

And then it was like. But then we just had, we conceived our first baby finally and yeah, so, but yeah, very grateful. But we just felt like spiritually both like that when we’re like, you know what, I feel like this was our gift after he left the world. So after my husband’s brother left the world, so yeah, so it was crazy.

But other than that, we, we got pregnant and pregnancy was great and now we have our little baby girl and she’s just precious. So So, so I, you’re here, you basically went from. Like, endometriosis, low AMH, low egg reserve, two eggs retrieved during your first IVF cycle, only, like, being told that one made it, but then not really because nothing was there, like it didn’t make it, to deciding you weren’t going to do IVF.

It wasn’t right for you. Starting this crazy mindset journey, trusting your gut and starting to work the system. And then, and you started in August of 2021 and you have a nine month old daughter now. So basically within a year of working on mindset, despite being told you had a 1% chance, less than 1% chance of natural, yeah, less than one.

Less than 1 percent chance of conceiving naturally. You now have a nine month old daughter. Yes, that is so true. And I would not have if you would have told me that back in the day that this was all happening. I would not have believed any of that. I’m like so crazy. What’s this mindset you’re talking about?

So I mean, it’s incredible. I mean, you know, it always interests me because it would have. That’s why I ask this question all the time. Like, what was it that made you trust yourself? Because You could have had that maternal, you know, that mama feeling that you were saying that mother knowing that, Hey, my body can do this.

And I think at some level we all have that, but I think very few people trust that. Like are willing to take the leap and trust that because dude, when we’re typically told we have 1 percent chance of success, we pretty much figure it’s over and it’s a gangster move for you to do what you did. What do you think drove you to trust that?

Because it’s one thing to hear the voice, Pauline saying my body can do this, but it’s another to believe it’s possible and trust that. So what do you think the trust was in you? Like, where did that come from? Oh, man, that’s a good question. Well, I mean, I feel like, sorry, I’m like thinking about it. Cause I’m like, I’m trying to think back.

Cause it was so long ago. What was my, I just felt like, no, I was able to overcome a lot of things in the past and. I was like, we’re not going into this whole history of my stuff, but, um, but just kind of, you know, like I was just kind of a go getter in that sense where I was like, you know what? I went through, you know, high school doing all those things and I’m in college and everything.

And I put myself through and I was always a go getter and I was just like, you know what? I’m going to do it. When I put my mind to it, I’m going to do it. And I felt like my competitive mind as well was just kind of like, no, like we’re going to beat the odds here. And. I’m not gonna listen to About this doctor.

I mean granted. It’s like yes, I respect his opinions and everything, but I felt like you know that’s just not me like i’m Competitive and i’m gonna do we’re gonna do this like somehow some way and I just yeah It was that that feeling and I guess, you know, just having that confidence to just be like, you know what, we’re my body can do it.

And yeah, I don’t have a hard question to answer. I’m just like, I don’t know what kind of turns for me there where it was like, I’m just gonna not think about what the statistics were. So yeah, I just like I said, like my gut feelings always usually right. I feel like it’s that women’s intuition. Yeah. I’m like, I don’t know what to say.

She was like, I just knew in my mind and my gut, but it was just all like, no, this is going to happen. And, you know, and granted it to kind of help my mom, she’s kind of a spiritual lady as well. And she was saying like, she’s like, oh, it’s, it’s going to happen naturally. You just wait, like you just wait, you know, you got mom or two.

I mean, yeah. Which was great. Yeah. You know, and, and having had the distinct honor. Of being by your side in this process, Pauline, I would offer an additional explanation because watching you and I remember, you know, this, that negativity you’re talking about, you wanted to succeed more than you wanted your fear.

And, and that’s essentially another way of saying what you just said, because. You’re a gangster, you’re a go getter, you’re not somebody that takes no for an answer, but you wanted to make this dream come true more than you wanted to stay safe, trapped in your fear, and obedient. Because you’re a gangster lady, you’re not obedient to shit, you know, and you’re not going to just obey when somebody says, yeah, pretty much give up on your dream, the only way it’s going to happen is with, you know, Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Yeah. Yeah, wait, that’s not gangster of me at all. Well, so now, what would the you of today? So as somebody, a living, breathing, actual non AI individual who has experienced this journey, what would you say to the women listening who may also be facing single digit or less odds? What would you want them to know?

I definitely would want you all to know That never give up, it’s possible, just keep your mindset, keep your eye on the prize, your mind in the game, your head in the game, definitely there were some ups and downs in my journey, I probably didn’t share too many details about it, but you know, like your things will be met, will happen for you, and just keep thinking that, and don’t stray away from whatever your mindset is for your goal to be a mom, because yeah.

You’re gonna be a mom and you’re gonna and it’s and it’s wonderful and it’s worth the wait and it’s worth the journey So I know it’s so cliche to say it just don’t give up on your dreams But really don’t just don’t give up just like what Roseanne sadly you want you get your be a go getter Be gangster.

No, like don’t give up on anything Don’t let anybody else tell you throw all these numbers at you and all that stuff just just ignore it and just kind of go forward and And just have confidence in yourself because you’re meant to be a mom and, and it’s wonderful and it’s going to happen for you. So, yes.

That’s so good, Polly. Well, you know, I’m so, so honored to have you on and I’m so grateful for your generosity here because So much changed for you. I mean, I thank you so much for sharing that golf ball story. That’s like the coolest thing ever. I’m like, I still have it in my bag. I’m like, I’m not going to use it.

Yeah. It’s crazy. Well, I mean, think about it. I mean, because it’s really easy to be such and you know, it’s funny. I observed this in people. Sometimes sometimes people find so much certainty in the science, but here’s the deal. The science is one part of it, but it’s not all of it. There were signs coming at you and think about who you had to become.

In order to look at an orange golf ball and know that shit was your sign, girl. Exactly. I know. Isn’t that funny? My husband was like, are you, like, what is going on with you? I’m like, blame Roseanne. She has me in this different mindset. And everything happens for a reason. And yeah, so. I will take full responsibility for being the facilitator in that if, if there, if I will be so, I’m so happy for that because what you ended up doing was believing in yourself and the possibility more than you believed in the fear, Pauline.

And if that’s what put that beautiful baby girl in your hands, hey. Start seeing all kinds of crazy shit all around you because there’s only more good coming for you. So Man, well, thank you so much. Love. Thank you so much for sharing and being so generous with the women listening I know that what you’ve shared here is not only going to inspire it is certainly going to help change lives And call lives in.

So thank you so much, Pauline. We love you. We’re going to be praying for you and your family. Thank you so much for sharing with us. Thank you so much for everything. I love you so much. My loves, if you have dry eyes, you need to go back and listen to this. I mean, wasn’t the golf ball story like crazy? I mean, didn’t that just get your heart a leaping and believing in your baby and the signs that are coming for you?

Look, as I said at the very beginning of this podcast, I know that Pauline would tell you that if she did it, so can you. So if you are in a place. Where you just know that this baby is meant for you and you just need to get out of your own way. It’s time to learn what I taught Pauline. My Fearlessly Fertile Method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say hell yes to covering their bases, mind and body.

So you don’t have to look back on this time in your life with regret. Look what Pauline did and look how quickly she did it. I work with women who are committed to success. To apply for your interview for this program, go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodology, as you heard yourself, is help women around the world make their mom dreams come true.

Their results speak for themselves. And look, mama, if you don’t have a mindset for success in this journey, baby, you have a gaping hole in your strategy. You’re missing a huge opportunity here. Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success. Till next time, change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of the Fearlessly Fertile Podcast?

Subscribe now and leave an awesome review. Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

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