Tasting Notes Include: Unbreakable(He's Alive Damn it!), Betty's Bad-Vibes-O-Meter, Jughead as Upside Down Daredevil, Veroinca Killing her own Dad(Offscreen though), and Nana Rose Stealing the Show and the souls of those who live with her. Hit us up on Instagram or Bluesky(if you can find us), or just email us like the early settlers used to do! Ha…

Tasting Notes Include: There was not a lot of actual talking about the show Riverdale due to, y'know, the state of everything and everyone. Find us on the internet if you need someone to talk to, either on Socials or through our Email. Have a Great Week, Be Kind, Check Underneath your Bed for Bombs before You Fuck, and Don't Fuck By the First 5 Epi…

Tasting Notes Include: Creation, Destruction, Science, Fuggin, Paradoxes, and Jugheads Bad Writing Go follow us on the internet(if you dare) or email us! We like the ladder form of communication better! Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where You Can, Don't Sleep Walk into Parallel Universe, and Don't Fuck By a Sausage-Based Homunculi! Our Socials: Blues…

Tasting Notes Include: Three Different Cheryls that are actually one Cheryl, Freaky Fridays, Hot Fangs, and Sabrina. Come find us and follow us on the internet(if you can find us) or reach out to us directly via email! Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where You Can, Dabble in the Occult, and Don't Fuck By Witches! Our Socials: Twitter/Bluesky: @Riverdal…

Tasting Notes Include: Fire, Brimstone, Deals, Devils, Evil, Souls, and More Deals. Follow our meager attempts at Social Media on Instagram and Bluesky, or (preferably) email us!! Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where You Can, Go Make a Deal with the Devil No Way Could Wrong, Be Kind, and Don't Fuck by The Fires of Hell! Our Socials: Twitter/Bluesky: @…

Tasting Notes Include: Ghosts, Ghosts, Ghosts, Babies, Wet Ghosts, Relationship Problems, Trauma, Cars, and Ghosts(of course) Hit us on the internet or, if you prefer(and we certainly do) email us! Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where You Can, Please become the driest ghost you can we can't keep cleaning up these long puddles, and Don't Fuck In a Car.…

Tasting Notes Include: RIVERVALE?! Just Dr. Kurdle, Archie Plants Trees, Jughead and Tabitha are cursed, Cheryl and Thornehill are now a sovereign nation and keeps all animal corpses found within their borders, and human sacrifices. Hit us up on the internet, or even better, email us about your best "Syrup Thunder" jokes! Have a Great Week, Find Jo…

Tasting Notes Include: Matt taking Psychic damage, a surprising lack of lies, and an overabundance of side tangents. We are on the internet and you can follow us if you want to, but we also have an email which you should use because we love hearing from you guys, Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where You Can, Make Good Television(Please) and DOn't Fuck…

Tasting Notes Include: Councils of Four, Jughead becoming a teacher again somehow, Betty becoming a real FBI agent, Hirame being forced out of town and then blowing up Archie's house, Cheryl seceding from the town(is that how that works?), Goulies doing more crimes and the Serpents are having none of it, Betty and Archie getting together as well as…

Tasting Notes Include: Alice's constant Haunted Brain, Musical Episodes, Veronica living with three men and Archie, Fangs, Toni and Tony, Britta living at Thornhill for reasons, Veronica and Archie breaking up, and Healing! We are on the Internet sometimes but it's best if you email us! Have a great week, Find Joy Where You Can, Get a Loofa and KEE…

Tasting Notes Include: Mothman revelations, Mine Collapses, Head Bonks, Botched Hit Attempts, Fasting, Magic(?), and Maybe Finally Finding Polly. Come find us on the internet, if you dare...or email us! Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where You Can, Get real cool with the elements, and Don't Fuck By a Mothman Suit! Our Social: Twitter/Bluesky: @Riverda…

Tasting Notes Include: Cheryl being the Living Saint of Bees, Betty being a fake Escort to trick truckers into telling her where Polly is, Jughead failing at the 12-step program and cornering Betty in the bunker, and Archie doing all his stuff off-screen. Hit us up on the internet or email us! Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where You Can, Do Stuff Off…

We're back again with more psychological damage from The CW! This episode is a double-edged sword of being a Josie and the Pussycats Pilot which is amazing, but also the fact that we don't have that show right now is an affront to humanity. Josie bails on her world tour because her dad died so she has to return to the town that didn't recognize her…

Oh, here we go with this shit again. We are going back into the vignettes but this time it's the backbone to the most elaborate booty call in history. Cheryl makes Archie and The Bruiser Studs mine for Palladium which makes them go crazy, Betty goes full Coyote Ugly and does some morally and legally questionable things, and Jughead gets high one ti…

Oh God, Oh No...we are back at it again. This episode has everything: A Dog with a man's name, PTSD, That Cayote Ugly thing, and stealing investors from Bad Daddy! Hit us up on the internet or via email(that one is preferred). Have a Great Week, Find Joy Where you can, Gather info on Truckers, and Don't Fuck by a pair of Hockey Pants Our Socials: T…

Oh god, Recap time gang, the wheels just keep on turning. Matt slowly goes insane while recounting the first 11 episodes while Mom and Jim slowly nod along. That's it, that's the whole thing. Reach out to us on the internet if you want or via email if you're a cool kid! Have a Great Week, Find Joy where you can, Never watch this show all at once, a…

This time Mom and Matt come correct with a full season of ALF watched between them, and force Jim to relive his childhood trauma. Consensus... the show is bad. Thank you all so much if you've made it through all of these dumb episodes, including this one. We love everyone who listens to this show, and we still can't believe that people actually kee…

Oh boy, this episode could've been an email, which could've been a fistfight. It's all about Hiram, telling us he was a young shoe shiner son who moved to Riverdale and joined the smallest gang ever, he gets mixed up in crime while also trying to get the girl(Hermione). His dad gets mad, goes to the boss, threatens to call the cops, and gets killed…

It's time for the annual "We need to stuff this episode more full of things than a Thanksgiving Turkey" portion of this season of Riverdale. Tabitha and Betty trip balls to try to find Jughead, it turns out Jughead is beaten up in Sketch Alley with his old mentor Doc who he saves and redeems himself and goes off to find trauma in New York. Archie h…

Things get wild here on ARRTI this week. Hirame has had a secret boner palladium, Reg seduces Nana Rose for the maple groves that are cursed so she says, Archie beats up a bunch of escaped felons and then has to choose between scapegoat status or war hero status, Jughead does a bunch of drugs to escape his writer's block and end up getting "abducte…

Hey everybody! This episode has just about everything! It has Archie in his best BALL Cap, Veronica bribing highschooler, Reg switching sides, lots of football stuff that only .5 out of the three of us get, Betty going apeshit on truckers looking for Polly, Kevin having a breakdown, and Jughead saving a kid from his sleepwalking. Follow us on the i…

Hey everybody! This episode has everything... It has haunted brains, it has swingers parties, it has second-guessing your life choices and dealing with the consequences of setting plans in motion...and bloody pay phone booths. Follow us on the internet or email us your best guess as to which it could be, Trauma or Aliens? Have a great week, find jo…

Tony and Cheryl are fighting, There's a Syrup Baby in the Kitchen, Jughead gets visited by Mothmen, Archie tries and fails to create a fire department, Corporal Jackson gets woke, Veronica makes up random currency for shits and gigs and it blows up in her face, and there are also sooooo many bodies in the marsh. Go follow us on the internet or emai…

Hello All! Welcome back to the endurance test we put on our brains for Fun! This episode includes Tin Cans(for most of it), Sexy Mothmen(For All of It), Veronica breaking up with her Bad Chaddy, Archie and Betty fucking INSIDE THE SCHOOL THEY TEACH AT, Finding a Body in the Marshes, Building a Football Team in a cave with a box of scraps, and takin…

Once again we trudge onward through the dreaded wastes of The CW's Riverdale. This episode includes Zoom Juice, Bad Sylvester Stalone impressions, Bad Raids, Even Worse Speeches, Very Specific Names, and Poor Decisions about Who Should Teach the Future of Riverdale. We are on the internet, come find us! Also, email us if you want to, we like it whe…

We are on to Season 5 BAY-BEE!! The overarching theme of this episode is The Boys Are Back In Town. Tony is Prego, Le Bon Nuit is now the White Wyrm, Archie is back from the Army to revive the RROTC, Betty is back from the FBI to pack up the FBI Bunker, Veronica is stuck in a bad marriage with a dude named Chad, and Jughead has writer's block. We s…

Hey everybody welcome to the recap for Season 4 of Riverdale! Matt is a little manic this episode because he had to do a for real overseas punch camp! Nevertheless all of them episode are covered one way or another and we have some call outs for what could possibly happen in Season 5. Come at us with your own predictions either on thee internet or …

Well, it took a few weeks and multiple seasons but WE'VE MADE IT TO THE END OF SEASON! These are the episode highlights: Everyone completes high school, Archie joins the army because of his haunted brain, time capsules are opened and also made, Everybody breaks up and goes to college with the vow that they will return to Pop's, nobody returns to Po…

The penultimate episode is upon us and it's a split decision on whether or not it was a good episode not. We'll let you decide, here's what happened: Jughead and Betty find out that it was indeed Chick and Chuck doing the murders, but they also reveal that it was Jellybean making the videos to keep Jughead home, Veronica and Hermosa topple their Ba…

Hey gang! Sorry we've been away, but we are back now! In a turn of events, we are ending the season 4 storyline that got cut because of...some stuff...before Matt does his recap. So here's what happened: Jughead and Betty do some investigating on the VHS tapes and find an underground film festival where only snuff films and sex tapes are played, th…

Here we are...at the end of another season of Riverdale, here's what happened: Mr. Honey cancels prom for some of the gang, the gang lobbies to get prom back, Honey then cancels prom for everyone, the gang gets the parents involved who then get prom back on, Honey makes a VHS tape threat that is seen through by Betty, Honey get fired and goes to wo…

Here we are, folks, at the penultimate episode of Season 4 of Riverdale. The show is scrambling is tie up loose ends and we hate every second of it. This episode consists of Archie and Betty edging each other before cutting things off, Jughead follows a lead on the VHS tapes and instead finds a dirty VHS market that Principal Honey looks at I guess…

Wow, what a lousy variety show episode we have here gang. This time, Riverdale does terrible things to the concept of Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Archie can't keep his gob shut or off of Betty's gob, and jughead won't do his homework because it's boring so he watches tapes instead. If you watched this episode and want to continue the lament we start…

Oh boy gang, this shit is getting worse and worse. So much so that Jim brought a soundboard to spice things up, all that happens in this episode is Jughead revealing that he isn't dead(gasp), then picks apart the fancy school kids and beats the crap out of BWW. Follow us on Twitter or Instagram or email us your soundboard app recommendations. Have …

Welcome back, everybody! Surprise JUGHEAD IS STILL ALIVE WHO WOULD HAVE GUESSED IT! This whole episode is all about making the preppy kids spin out about not being able to frame Betty for their murder of Jughead and it almost works. Betty and Archie start to fake hookup behind Veronica's back, everyone we haven't seen in a while has some feelings, …

So Jughead is totally dead and you can't convince us otherwise. The Scooby Gang tries to get their stories straight and then proceeds to not stick to them, F.P. doesn't know how to ping phones or conduct a search party, and there's a real thing called devils breath that they decided to google and put in this episode. Seek us out on social media or …

Oh shit, y'all we are back yet again! Episode Highlights include: Veronica is now a party girl to deal with the fact that her daddy has a disease, Archie finally catches the bug that makes you wake up and want to do something with your life, Jughead and Betty try to crack the stonewall academy case wide open and then Jughead dies. Follow us on our …

Oh boy everybody we are talking a lot about ALF in this one. Episode Highlights: Jughead does a three-round duel with the B Double Dubs, Veronica goes to New York to cavort with Katy Keene and discovers her dad has a disease, Archie helps his mercenary daddy uncle frank fight a man trying to kill them, Betty and Alice go on a hunt for compromising …

MOM IS BACK EVERYBODY! This week's Highlights include: Betty being a Quiz Queen, Archie demotes Former Keller to make his daddy Uncle Frank the foreman and oops turns out he can't run a company from high school, Veronica and Cheryl corner the chemistry teacher to make sure their rum is 51 percent different than bad daddy's rum, Jughead creates the …

The last episode of Josie and the Peachy Keene's is upon us friends, here's (kind of) what happened: Katy gets into Parsons School of Design, K.O moves to Philly to do the Punch Camp, Josie actually sings the songs she wrote in a band with a record label, Jorge saves his block from Hiram Lodge, and Pepper opens the Pepper Plant for all of her frien…

This week on Josie and the Peachy Keene's: Katy makes a dress for the princess that she home-wrecked (awkward), and she completes a side quest to get an internship to make her dreams come true, but it is not as easy as she thinks. Jorge semi-comes out as a drag queen to his dad who doesn't fully support it because Jorge gets jumped by thugs while i…

Back at it again! We are going through another 3 episodes of the surprisingly good show Katy Keene! The gang goes through katy's breakup, a heartwarming polar vortex, and a mystery of Katy's parents! Shit gets wild, and if yoyu want to talk about it with us on the internet hit us up on there, or email us about it! Have great week, find joy where yo…

Hey! Don't tell Mom but Jim and Matt are going OFF THE RAILS! This is a limited series where Jim watches The Charles Whitlock Original, Katy Keene! This is a (surprisingly good) show about some twenty-somethings, and a seventeen-year-old high school dropout chasing their dreams in the BIG APPLE! Katy wants to be a big-time fashion designer, Jorge w…

Well gang, they weren't lying about ANYTHING. We keep up the theme of not wanting to talk about Riverdale and instead talking about good media. Hit us up on social media! We love internet friends. If you are too cool for social media and just do emails, we have one of those too! Matt and his Mom will be on a cruise so we are taking a month off to d…

Veronica makes her fathers rum the same but different, Football sucks and we hate it, Archies Uncle gives Monroe drugs to play the game even after he got beat up by fancy school, Betty does some digging for some dirt on fancy school and she finds out that Jughead is in the stupid secret society, and Jughead got into Yale! That is it for this week! …

This week, Archie disregards therapy and fights with F.P., Jughead finds his forest pee-paw who actually sold the BBU to F.J Dupont. Meanwhile, Veronica puts on one last rager in front of a college recruiter who LOVES IT and Betty deprograms herself(?) from the farm's hypnosis with help from Charles. Oh, and it turns out Penelope was gaslighting Ch…

Everybody gets healed by the school's guidance counselor...except Archie. That's it, that's the whole episode. If you want to reach out and say hi on the internet, either on Instagram or Twitter OR our email! Have a great week, find joy where you can, try out an eye patch, and see what your friends think, Be kind, and Don't Fuck by Therapy. Our Ins…

Jughead and Betty both fuck and call a shot that becomes a reality. Hiram, Hermoine, F.P., and Alice make Pop work on Thanksgiving and get into a big ol' fight in the speakeasy. Cheryl and Toni make Cheryl's aunt think that they fed her the remains of her husband, and Archie doesn't know how to pressure cook a turkey, which ends up saving many peop…

This episode includes Jughead going crazy and finding out his hero stole his grandpappy's book, Archie getting into a competition to see who can have the most kids on his side, Betty and Kevin confronting Charles(who is a recovering drug addict), and Veronica hating her long lost sister for being daddy's favorite. Say hi to us on the internet where…

In this episode, Jughead is bad at Werewolf but so is everyone else, Betty and Kevin give the junior FBI the ol' college try, Archie gets maced and then threatens the whole neighborhood to stop them from being mean to him, and Veronica does some more blackmail. Also, Hiram wants to run for mayor. We have t-shirts that support the Abortion Care Netw…