In 2011, Bennett Miller somehow made us care about baseball when he turned a book about the Oakland A’s and a couple of sabermetricians into a feature-length drama featuring Brad Pitt, his bff Jonah Hill, and the great Philip Seymour Hoffman. Sabermetricians? You’re goddamn right! I vocabulary like a mug. This flick struggled in production but Aaro…

In 2014, a puppy was kicked to death, and a tale of vengeance and healing followed with Chad Stahelski’s action banger, John Wick. Starring Keanu Reeves as the iconic title character who finds therapy in murder as he grieves his way through an organized crime family responsible for killing that puppy I mentioned earlier. This comic-inspired flick s…

In 2003 Tim Burton found himself hung up in tall tales with his fantastical family drama, Big Fish. This flick netted some huge talent with Ewan McGregor, Albert Finney, Billy Crudup, Jessica Lange and many other notable names and faces as we brave the waters of this father and son’s tumultuous relationship told over the backdrop of an old man’s of…

Len Wiseman’s debut in 2003 was no cause for celebration, but it could be said that Underworld, the film he popped his cherry on, was. Featuring Kate Beckinsale as Selene, the vampire enchantress who hunts werewolves and was responsible for the most sexual awakenings since Princess Leia went commando. This flick is basically Romeo and Juliet with s…

It was the year 1999, and people were terrified of computers ending their life because they couldn’t handle change. But John McTiernan was cool as a cucumber working on what some people call The Thomas Crown Affair, his art heist remake/retake on the ‘60s flick of the same name. Pierce Brosnan faces off against Rene Russo and Denis Leary as he stea…

In 1997, we saw a dark comedy thriller-type flick called Suicide Kings. Peter O'Fallon directed this cast of B and C-level actors for their ill-fated plan to kidnap a mobster in hopes he can fund or find their kidnapped friend. This flick did not do well, making less than a couple million in the $5 million budget and struggled for positive reviews.…

1993 brought us Stephen Hopkins’ action flick, Judgement Night. This flick tells the story of a group of friends who take a wrong turn into a bad area of Chicago where they witness a murder and become hunted by Denis Leary and his gang as they attempt to clean up any witnesses. This flick is another sentimental one for a couple of us, so even thoug…

In 2011 we were elevated watching Your Highness, David Gordon Green’s stoner fantasy flick starring and co-written by Danny McBride. This flick has us following a spoiled prince with a big heart and a substance abuse problem as he embarks on his first quest filled with danger and reluctant hand-jobs. This flick did not do well critically or financi…

We are celebrating Christmas with Ted Demme’s 1994 dark comedy, The Ref, starring Denis Leary, Kevin Spacey, Judy Davis, and Glynis Johns. The Ref tells the story of a burglar who ends up taking a family hostage as a way of eluding capture as the cops scour the area for him; however, he gets more than he bargained for when the family turns out to b…

1974 brought the controversy and the funny with Mel Brook’s Blazing Saddles. This flick undertook the mission of taking on racism and westerns through the story of a black, half-Dutch, sheriff appointed to a small town of morons to reduce it’s worth so a dirty politician can buy it up and gentrify it. Blazing Saddles features the sparkling chemistr…

Welcome to Spaceballs, the writeup. As you have likely noticed, this week we are bringing you another silly flick and the first of two Mel Brooks movies that we’ll be doing this December. This one stars Bill Pullman, John Candy, Mel Brooks, and Rick Moranis in a spoof of Star Wars that became an all-time classic and one of the most quotable movies …

In 2004 we got royally baked with Danny Leiner’s 2004 stoner comedy, Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle. This silly flick stars John Cho and Kal Penn as the title duo who find themselves on an epic quest for the perfect high meal which leads to hijinx, a pile of great cameos, and a couple of sequels. Harold & Kumar brought in $23 million from the $9…

In 1980, we were flying high with the directorial debut of the trio known as ZAZ when their careers took off with the hit Airplane!. This silly slapstick flick stars Robert Hays and Julie Hagerty alongside the comedic debut of Leslie Nielson as we watch a relationship explode amidst bad fish and faulty autopilots. This movie made a silly amount of …

This glorious Sunday the gang got down with alliteration and gossip when we watched What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, Lasse Hallström’s ’93 family drama. Starring Johnny Depp, Juliette Lewis, and Leonardo DiCaprio in a role that secured him his first Oscar loss and a ton of confused first interactions afterwards. This flick brought in a whopping $1 mill…

Back in 2008 we learned the value of family when Adam McKay introduced us to his Step Brothers, starring Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly. This flick brings us the trials of two adult men trapped in mental adolescence who are forced to take care of themselves when their newlywed parents have enough of their antics after the two crash a boat load of …

Today, we are sneaking in with a Steven Soderbergh flick that did not have a theatrical release but rather premiered on TV. The film? Behind the Candelabra starring Michael Douglas and Matt Damon as Liberace and the jaded lover who wrote the book from which the movie was based. Speaking of based, HBO was the only company based enough to make a movi…

It’s that groovy time of year when the dead come back to life as we watch Evil Dead rise from the grave for Fede Álvarez’s 2013 remake of Sam Raimi’s cult classic. This flick brought a complete reimagining of the original with a number of nods to the flick that started as a proof of concept from two friends and refused to die, bringing us 5 films s…

Welcome to The Cell, Tarsem Singh's beautiful and haunting vision brought to the big screen in this awe-inspiring SciFi-horror. Starring Jenny from the block and a couple of Vinces we are brought into the mind of a twisted serial killer in a desperate attempt to find and free his final victim from certain death. This film performed very well at the…

In 2007, David Fincher brought us his aptly named gritty true-crime thriller based on the Zodiac killer, Zodiac. Fincher is joined by Jake Gyllenhall, Mark Ruffalo and Robert Downey Jr., alongside several other familiar faces for this murderous journey down memory lane as we watch the case unfold from various perspectives. Zodiac was nominated for …

In 2014 John Erick Dowdle directed a little horror flick he and his brother wrote called As Above, So Below. Taken from some ancient religious and alchemical source material, this flick takes us on a ride through the Paris catacombs in search of The Philosopher Stone, pre-Hogwarts era, and finds us trapped in the depths of hell with cool cults and …

Back in ’93, or Before Shrek, we call it, BS for short, we were treated to a soft entry into the spooky dark comedy basement with So I Married an Axe Murderer. This flick was directed by Thomas Schlamme and features Mike Myers as the star character, but includes some familiar faces in bit-roles throughout. As the title suggests, Myers finds himself…

Imagine this: it’s 1984, the date, not the bleak political statement, but nonetheless, you are concerned because you have just sat down with a finite amount of popcorn and candy but an infinite amount of story with the incorrectly titled The Never Ending Story. This story tells the story of a little meatball getting picked on all the time because h…

Today, we travel back to a time of perms and material girls with James Foley's 1986 At Close Range. This flick features Sean Penn as a troubled young guy who wants to connect with his deadbeat dad and do some crime, but when the nice crime turns to bad crime, things get dangerous. Anywho, this flick lost money but has a ton of star power and most i…

The year is 2000. The world is terrified of the Y2K bug, but not as terrified as Hollywood Directors were of Steven Soderbergh, who felt that his best chance of a Best Director Oscar was to be nominated twice, which paid off with a win for Traffic. Traffic tells the story, well, three stories actually, of the war on drugs from the viewpoint of a dr…

Welcome back to the fairytale kingdom for Super Shrek Sunday! That’s right, this week we’re gonna do an animated flick, and it’s the mad ogrish, Shrek. Shrek is all about the loveable, curmudgeonly ogre who goes on a mission to win back his swamp and ends up with a half-woman, half-ogre side piece and a talking donkey. Shrek made an ass load of dou…

We are travelling to the year 1990 this time, and we arrive from down under. Under where? Under Tom Selleck’s sexy Australian moustache, of course, while we check out his western drama, Quigley Down Under. QDU tells the tale of an American cowboy who heads to Australia for a job using his special skill, long-distance shooting. However, when he find…

In 1995 Sam Raimi woke up from his slumber to find Bruce Campbell running his fingers through his hair. “Quickly want some head?” Bruce asked. Sam, a still groggy little spoon, misheard him and the rest is history, Quick and the Dead was born. Quick and the Dead tells the story of a small town gun fighter tournament which acts as the setting for a …

In 2010 the Coen brothers brought us a remake with real sand when they emerged from their Hollywood sex grottos with True Grit. Starring Jeff Bridges in the John Wayne role as Rooster Cogburn alongside Matt “rape stache” Damon, and Hailee Steinfeld in her breakout role as a young girl looking to avenge her father’s murder. This flick brought in a b…

In 2012 a man who goes by the name Tarantino brought us a story about a man named Django and his chains or lack thereof in Django Unchained! Tarantino brought another amazing cast together for this love story backdropped in a terrible, and not-too-distant past, featuring Jamie Foxx, Samuel Jackson, Leo, and Christoph Waltz alongside many bit parts …

In the ‘90s we were spoiled by Roland Emmerich as he first birthed the timeless classic, Universal Soldier, only to follow it up with the stellar, Stargate. This flick takes us across the universe through a goopy portal as we follow a suicidal soldier and a fringe scientist into an alien desert to anger the sun god himself. No, not George Hamilton,…

In the year two thousand there was a guy named Guy who made a movie that snatched our attention called Snatch. Coincidence? I think not… This was the movie that really birthed Jason Statham’s career and gave the world one of Brad Pitt’s most beloved characters, Mickey, in addition to like 30 more characters for you to fall in love with too. Snatch …

Just before the new millennium, Joe Johnston brought a young Jake Gyllenhaal to the screen with October Sky. Coming to us from the dawn of the space age as Sputnik eclipsed the stratosphere and ignited a passion in a few kids and their town, despite a couple of dads being dicks all the time... Jake plays Homer, the key ingredient in a rocket group …

In 1999 a strange thing happened—an unknown writer and two unknown directors decided to make an R-rated titty movie for teens and sexually repressed adult men who didn’t get laid in high school, and it fucking worked! It also spawned a movie franchise with a total of nine films and countless exposed nipples, and the rest is history! The story follo…

In 2004, Quentin Tarantino concluded Beatrix Kiddo's revenge saga as she works to complete her journey to the showdown with the deadliest snake-charming hippy ever in Kill Bill Volume 2. KB2 has a wild cast, with Uma Thurman as the Bride, David Carradine as the Bill to be Killed, Michael Madsen as Bill's brother Budd, Daryl Hannah as one-eyed Elle,…

Hold onto your butts, folks, because on the latest episode of Hold Up, Jon, Colin, and Brent are locked, loaded, and ready to tackle the cinematic masterpiece known as "Enemy at the Gates." Is it a timeless war epic or a relic gathering more dust than grandma's strap-on collection? Well, strap in for a wild ride as these three self-proclaimed film …

Today we are going waaaaaay back in time to 1957 as we go for a long walk on a short bridge with David Lean’s, The Bridge on the River Kwai. This is a World War 2 epic about a bunch of POW’s that are captured in a dense jungle prison camp and are at odds with the camp general who has been tasked with having them build a railroad over the aforementi…

In 2007 Zack Snyder took the grand challenge of converting a beloved graphic novel into a film. He immediately crammed as many hot dudes as he could find into a gym and began work on his historical action adaptation, 300. Starring the chinniest man of them all, Gerard Butler, as the Spartan king Leonidas who will disobey the council and take 300 of…

Did you know San Diego means whale vagina in German? Good morning, San Diego, and welcome to the Hold Up Podcast, I’m Tits McGee, and today we’ll be going over Adam McKay’s 2004 guffaw-inducing, Anchorman. This flick is responsible for more requoted lines than any other movie (source needed) and cemented Will Ferrell’s place in the comedy Hall of F…

Marc Forster went for an ambitious trip down a fantastical dramedy avenue when he brought us his 2006 feature, Stranger Than Fiction. Showing Will Ferrell in a more sincere role than he’s typically known for, Stranger Than Fiction brings us into the world of the writer as God; toiling with their creations until somehow one becomes aware of their pu…

Today we’re going old school with Todd Phillips' 2003 comedy hit, Old School. Luke Wilson stars as a loveable bachelor who finds his wife banging a ton of people and, as a result, finds himself learning how to live again. Fortunately, he has friends who help him get back under his feet by starting a frat full of mismatched outcasts. This flick mode…

In 2010 Adam McKay taught us how to do a desk pop with his star-studded action comedy, The Other Guys. This flick brings us to the other side of the police force, the paper bitches and Yankee clippers, who support the hero’s doing the real police work. Well, this flick is about them getting their chance and people were all about it; making $170 mil…

In 2010, Simon Pegg allowed Edgar Wright to do a film without him, and the result was a stylish, mountain dew fueled, Scott Pilgrim vs The World. Based on the graphic novel, we are brought into the world of Scott Pilgrim, the 22-year-old loveable loser who is trying to get a record contract while dating a 17-year-old and also battling the seven evi…

In 1988 Ron Howard released a long movie about little people with his fantasy adventure classic, Willow. We journey alongside a 17-year-old Warwick Davis as the title character, Willow. He is tasked with saving a child and achieving self-actualization as a scoundrel, and some brownies join him to fulfill his destiny. This movie made back a bunch of…

In 2008 Darren Aronofsky decided to unleash his emo rainbow in his ongoing quest to make humanity sad with, The Wrestler. Aronofsky unleashes the powerful Mickey Rourke as the title character, Randy “The Ram” Robinson, a superstar wrestler whose star has since faded and is unable to pursue his passion because his heart did a 30-foot powerbomb from …

In 2001 Steven Soderbergh released his remake of the rat pack classic Ocean's Eleven featuring a cast to rival the star quality of the original. George Clooney stars as the man with the plan as he assembles a killer crew of thieves to rob 3 casinos while also stealing back his girl. This flick took a massive payday and birthed a few sequels but doe…

In 1997 Big Bobby Zemeckis connected us to the universe with Contact, a sci-fi drama based on Carl Sagan’s novel. Contact is about a brilliant scientist with daddy issues who is motivated only by her search for life in the cosmos. However, things get complicated when she finds a preacher with cum-gutters and actual alien messages. This flick was a …

Today we are racing back to 2003 to the exciting world of horse racing and oceanic snacks with Seabiscuit as we wrap up animal sidekick (almost) month. Gary Ross wrote and directed this Hollywood epic about an unlikely champion racing horse and his team of mismatched handlers and how they captured America’s hearts and gave them hope…it was a long t…

For our second animal sidekick movie, we are rolling over to another buddy cop movie minus one Belush, add Tom Hanks and a different pooch, and you’ve got Turner and Hooch. This flick takes off after an old friend of Turner’s is killed, and he takes his giant mess of a dog to avoid it being put down. Then, T&H work together on solving the crime, an…

Welcome back suckers! This week we kick off animal sidekick month, albeit a little late, with K-9. “What’s that?” you think to yourself, “a dog, cop movie or something?”. Good guess genius, that’s exactly what it is, a buddy cop dog flick starring none other than the Belush himself. Not that Belush, the other Belush. Anywho, this thing stars James …

In 1974 the well-known child rapist, Roman Polanski, released what is widely thought to be a perfect movie, a one-hundred percenter, a hold-up if you will. But today we put this supposed masterpiece to the test as we go down to Chinatown! Chinatown features a young Jack Nicholson and Faye Dunaway in this detective noir story which leads through a s…