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Parenting Stories, Struggles and Strategies for Moms and Dads of School-aged Children, Teenagers, and Impactful Parents
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279: Not Everyone Is Going To Like You. Parenting strategies to help kids cope.
Manage episode 436832522 series 2842357
Not Everyone Is Going To Like You. Parenting strategies to help kids cope.
đŻDiscover strategies that parents can use to help their children cope with the frustration, anxiety, sadness and anger that comes with this type of rejection.
đ„Help your child learn to cope with these big feelings and focus on the kids that will lift them up instead.
đ„ Learn 5 parenting strategies that can help your child today!
-----
LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDINGhttps://theimpactfulparent.com/app Download the FREE Impactful Parent App! Available on Apple and Android App Stores. FREEBIES from episodes included!
Apple Store: https://theimpactfulparent.com/ios
Android Play Store: https://theimpactfulparent.com/android
https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.
----
Rate, Review, & Subscribe!
"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer! Thank you for making my parenting journey better!" <â If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people â just like you!!!
Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!
Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!
What to do next:
- Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
- Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you donât already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
- Subscribe to the PODCAST
- Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, momâs groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
- Discover how you can work with Kristina! Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!
Bottom Line... I am here for YOU! Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com
------
Episode Transcript:
How Can I Teach My Child That Not Everyone Is Going To Like Them?
Welcome impactful parents! Today we have a great question submitted by a follower and parent like you that reads, âmy child gets really upset when they think someone doesnât like them at school. It causes so much drama in our house. How do I teach my child that not everyone will like them no matter what they do?â
This is a great question and not an easy situation. I am really glad this parent DMed me and if you have a question that youâd like some help with- you can DM me too. All submission are kept anonymous.
It is important to support our children in learning the âNot everyone will like youâ lesson as early as possible. They need to develop the coping skills they need to continue feeling good about THEMSELVES and not rely so much on external validation. If they continue to wallow in the sadness of âthat person doesnât like me,â then it could affect their mental health, and your child can start to develop a habit of thinking like a victim. We donât want them. We want our kids to be confident and empowered.
So what should parents do to help turn this victim mentality into empowerment? Today I am going to give you 5 suggestions. Letâs get started.
First, you want to validate your childâs feelings. I know you might want to say, âDonât worry about it. That person isnât worth your time, and who cares if they like you!â But that does NOTHING for your child. Instead, let your child be heard. Tell them that itâs ok to feel sad that they think someone doesnât like them. Validate that it doesnât feel good. And then LISTEN. Donât try and fix anything. Just listen. Donât give advice. Just listen. Giving your child the stage to talk and let out their feelings BEFORE you start making suggestions is a priority.
Step 2 is talking about the reasons WHY someone might not like them. Remind your child that it may not even be their fault or anything that they can control. There are infinite reasons why someone might not like you, but here are a few of the most common reasons.
- You remind the person of something they are lacking. Is your child better at a sport, gets better grades, is more attractive or likable? Your child might make others jealous of their successes and talents. Of course, this has nothing to do with your child. Instead, this is a reflection of the insecurities and jealousy of the other child. The jealous child likely feels bad about themselves because your child reminds them of their failures and imperfections.
- Your child might remind them of something bad. For example, if your child looks like a bully from the other childâs past, then your child wonât be liked. Again, not your childâs fault. But the trauma of one personâs past can cause them not to like you because you remind them of things they want to forget.
- Your child feels like a threat. Sometimes a person will dislike someone who threatens their position. For example, does the other child think your child will steal their friends, take away from their attention, or steal their status?
- Perhaps the other child is projecting their own fears on your child. Some kids will gossip about others to empower themselves. This is the classic case of someone bullying or putting someone down to build themselves up and regain some power. Ultimately, the other child feels powerless.
Go through this list with your child and examine with them, Could This Be Why?
Step 3 is to start asking questions about how YOUR CHILD's behaviors might have made the other person feel. As much as we would like to believe that our kids are angels, there are circumstances when our children provoke the situation. Start a conversation about how their behaviors might have a domino effect on others. Were they bragging too much? Were they leaving someone out on accident? Were they talking about things that made others uncomfortable?
The main point here is that your child needs to realize that their actions have reactions. Talk about how they might have contributed to the situation.
Step 4 is to encourage your child to have a self-positive talk in their head. Even if they donât believe themselves at first, encourage your child to give themselves a pep talk throughout the day. For example, have them think, âI am ok. I donât need everyone to like me.â âI canât please everybody, and thatâs ok. I can only be my best self.â
And lastly, encourage your child to spend time with people who do like them. Extra time with friends that will lift your childâs spirits and make them gain confidence is easy for parents to allow and encourage.
62 episoder
Manage episode 436832522 series 2842357
Not Everyone Is Going To Like You. Parenting strategies to help kids cope.
đŻDiscover strategies that parents can use to help their children cope with the frustration, anxiety, sadness and anger that comes with this type of rejection.
đ„Help your child learn to cope with these big feelings and focus on the kids that will lift them up instead.
đ„ Learn 5 parenting strategies that can help your child today!
-----
LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDINGhttps://theimpactfulparent.com/app Download the FREE Impactful Parent App! Available on Apple and Android App Stores. FREEBIES from episodes included!
Apple Store: https://theimpactfulparent.com/ios
Android Play Store: https://theimpactfulparent.com/android
https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.
----
Rate, Review, & Subscribe!
"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer! Thank you for making my parenting journey better!" <â If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people â just like you!!!
Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!
Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!
What to do next:
- Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
- Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you donât already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
- Subscribe to the PODCAST
- Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, momâs groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
- Discover how you can work with Kristina! Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!
Bottom Line... I am here for YOU! Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com
------
Episode Transcript:
How Can I Teach My Child That Not Everyone Is Going To Like Them?
Welcome impactful parents! Today we have a great question submitted by a follower and parent like you that reads, âmy child gets really upset when they think someone doesnât like them at school. It causes so much drama in our house. How do I teach my child that not everyone will like them no matter what they do?â
This is a great question and not an easy situation. I am really glad this parent DMed me and if you have a question that youâd like some help with- you can DM me too. All submission are kept anonymous.
It is important to support our children in learning the âNot everyone will like youâ lesson as early as possible. They need to develop the coping skills they need to continue feeling good about THEMSELVES and not rely so much on external validation. If they continue to wallow in the sadness of âthat person doesnât like me,â then it could affect their mental health, and your child can start to develop a habit of thinking like a victim. We donât want them. We want our kids to be confident and empowered.
So what should parents do to help turn this victim mentality into empowerment? Today I am going to give you 5 suggestions. Letâs get started.
First, you want to validate your childâs feelings. I know you might want to say, âDonât worry about it. That person isnât worth your time, and who cares if they like you!â But that does NOTHING for your child. Instead, let your child be heard. Tell them that itâs ok to feel sad that they think someone doesnât like them. Validate that it doesnât feel good. And then LISTEN. Donât try and fix anything. Just listen. Donât give advice. Just listen. Giving your child the stage to talk and let out their feelings BEFORE you start making suggestions is a priority.
Step 2 is talking about the reasons WHY someone might not like them. Remind your child that it may not even be their fault or anything that they can control. There are infinite reasons why someone might not like you, but here are a few of the most common reasons.
- You remind the person of something they are lacking. Is your child better at a sport, gets better grades, is more attractive or likable? Your child might make others jealous of their successes and talents. Of course, this has nothing to do with your child. Instead, this is a reflection of the insecurities and jealousy of the other child. The jealous child likely feels bad about themselves because your child reminds them of their failures and imperfections.
- Your child might remind them of something bad. For example, if your child looks like a bully from the other childâs past, then your child wonât be liked. Again, not your childâs fault. But the trauma of one personâs past can cause them not to like you because you remind them of things they want to forget.
- Your child feels like a threat. Sometimes a person will dislike someone who threatens their position. For example, does the other child think your child will steal their friends, take away from their attention, or steal their status?
- Perhaps the other child is projecting their own fears on your child. Some kids will gossip about others to empower themselves. This is the classic case of someone bullying or putting someone down to build themselves up and regain some power. Ultimately, the other child feels powerless.
Go through this list with your child and examine with them, Could This Be Why?
Step 3 is to start asking questions about how YOUR CHILD's behaviors might have made the other person feel. As much as we would like to believe that our kids are angels, there are circumstances when our children provoke the situation. Start a conversation about how their behaviors might have a domino effect on others. Were they bragging too much? Were they leaving someone out on accident? Were they talking about things that made others uncomfortable?
The main point here is that your child needs to realize that their actions have reactions. Talk about how they might have contributed to the situation.
Step 4 is to encourage your child to have a self-positive talk in their head. Even if they donât believe themselves at first, encourage your child to give themselves a pep talk throughout the day. For example, have them think, âI am ok. I donât need everyone to like me.â âI canât please everybody, and thatâs ok. I can only be my best self.â
And lastly, encourage your child to spend time with people who do like them. Extra time with friends that will lift your childâs spirits and make them gain confidence is easy for parents to allow and encourage.
62 episoder
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