Navigating Pregnancy With An Eating Disorder: HOPE VIRGO

BLUE MUMDAYS

To mark 'Eating Disorder Awareness Week', I'm joined by Hope Virgo, who chats to me about navigating pregnancy with an eating disorder. Hope is an author and multi award winning campaigner. In 2018, Hope launched the #DumpTheScales campaign, which put eating disorders on the Government's agenda. Since then it has gone from strength to strength making change happen on a national scale, including a national march taking place in London on 22nd April 2023.

This episode was recorded last spring - since then, I'm happy to report that Hope had a beautiful healthy baby boy, who has been accompanying her on much of her campaigning work. Both he and Hope are doing well.

*TRIGGER WARNING: *Disordered Eating and very brief mention of Sexual Abuse*

IN THIS EPISODE WE DISCUSS:

[00:00] Teaser quote.

[02:35 ] Introduction to Hope Virgo.

[04:58] Hope's eating disorder - a coping mechanism for childhood trauma.

[06:44] The pressure put on women when they are pregnant.

[08:51] What prompted Hope's eating disorder.

[12:11] What support might be available for Hope after having her baby.

[13:01] Breastfeeding pressure.

[17:30] The need to be your own advocate.

[19:06] Eating disorders affect more people than you think, many of whom suffer in silence.

[20:38] Mixed support - the need for education.

[21:56] Navigating eating when you're pregnant.

[25:00] Societal pressure - the size of your bump, the pressure to 'snap back' after birth, how much and what you are eating.

[31:51] The potential affect of eating disorders on fertility - loss of periods.

[33:12] Using exercise to numb emotions.

[36:32] Hope's campaigning work.

[41:23] Advice for anyone affected by disordered eating or exercise addiction.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

1. Follow and support Hope's campaigning via her Instagram and Twitter feeds. You can also get in touch with her via LinkedIn.
2. It's a myth that eating disorders are about vanity - they are much more complex than that.
3. 16% of pregnant women have experienced an eating disorder. 50% of them will relapse within a year of delivery.
4. Eating disorders claim more lives than any other mental illness.
5. Eating disorders can affect anybody and everybody - you don't have to look like you have an eating disorder to be suffering from one. They don't only affect thin people or white teenage girls.
6. You can access support and information through Beat Eating Disorders, the UK's Eating Disorder charity.
7. Find out about the Bristol Eating Disorders Health Integration Team here. Click this link to read and download their Eating Disorders Support Resources Guide.
8. Click this link to read Abigail Reynolds' guest blog for the Maternal Mental Health Alliance, Eating Disorders and the perinatal period.
9. Support and sign Hope's Dump The Scales Campaign via this link.
10. Read more here about Hope's latest Change The Story Campaign.
11. You can Buy Hope's Books including ‘Stand Tall Little Girl: Facing Up To Anorexia’ here.

If you enjoyed this episode, please share, rate and subscribe. It really does make the difference in helping others find it – which means helping more parents in need.

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NEXT EPISODE:

The One About Hormones - my next guest is Dr Hannah Short, a GP Specialist in Menopause, P.O.I. (Premature Ovarian Insufficiency) and Premenstrual Disorders. In this fascinating episode, Hannah educates me on P.M.D.D. (Pre Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder) and P.M.E. (Premenstrual Exacerbation). She also talks about her own experience of premature surgical menopause at the age of 35.

SUPPORT:

If you are struggling right now, please know that it’s okay to talk and reach out for help.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND WILL NOT FEEL THIS WAY FOR EVER.

*** For support specific to this episode, see Key Takeaways ***

We hope these support services are helpful (please note we do not check or monitor them individually).

Action on Postpartum Psychosis (APP)

Moderated Forum, click here to find out more.

Email: [e-mail]

Tel: [phone]

The ADHD Foundation - the neurodiversity charity

Call us - 0151 541 9020

Email - [e-mail]

AIMS for better birthing.

Email: [e-mail]

This email will go to a group of AIMS volunteers and someone will respond as soon as possible.

Telephone: [phone]

You will be able to leave a voicemail message which will be sent to all our Helpline Volunteers. Please include your name, phone number and brief details of your enquiry. A Volunteer will try to call you back as soon as possible.

Andy's Man Club

A non-judgemental talking group for men

https://andysmanclub.co.uk/club-information/clubs/

Email: [e-mail]

Association of Postnatal Illness

Helpline: 10am – 2pm – 0207 386 0868

Email: [e-mail]

Live chat online facility

Beat Eating Disorders,

The UK's eating disorder charity.

Help for England

Helpline: 0808 801 0677

Email: [e-mail]

Help for Scotland

Helpline: 0808 801 0432

Email: [e-mail]

Help for Wales

Helpline: 0808 801 0433

Email: [e-mail]

Help for Northern Ireland

Helpline: 0808 801 0434

Email: [e-mail]

Best Beginnings

Free NHS-accredited Baby Buddy app offering

evidence-based information and self-care tools to help parents during pregnancy

and early stages of parenting.

App users also have access to a confidential, text-based Crisis Messenger which provides

24/7 support for new and expectant parents who are feeling extremely anxious or overwhelmed.

Bi-Polar UK

email: [e-mail]

Birth Trauma Association

Email: [e-mail]

CALM

Contact CALM

on their national helpline: 0800 58 58 58 (5pm-midnight)

Cedar House Support Group

Email: [e-mail] (Liz Wise)

Mobile: [phone]

Contact: for families with disabled children

Support, advice and information for parents with disabled children.

• helpline: 0808 808 3555
• website: https://contact.org.uk/

Contact a Family

www.cafamily.org.uk

Contact a Family offer support for all childhood conditions, are also able to put families in touch. Featuring a directory of conditions and rare disorders online.

Helpline: 0808 808 3555 (lines open Monday – Friday 9.30am – 5pm)

CLAPA – Cleft Lip and Palate Association

www.clapa.com

Information and support on cleft lip and palate treatment.

Dad Matters

Support dads to have successful relationships with their families, with mental health and accessing services through peer support and signposting.

[e-mail]

0161 344 0669

DadsNet

Offers support and knowledge through a community of dads on practical parenting and fatherhood.

Dope Black Dads

A digital safe space for fathers who wish to discuss their experiences of being black, a parent and masculinity in the modern world.

[e-mail]

Family Lives

An organisation providing immediate help from volunteer parent support workers 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

• helpline: 0808 800 2222
• website: www.familylives.org.uk

Family Rights Group

Support for parents and other family members whose children are involved with or need social care services.

• helpline: 0808 801 0366
• website: www.frg.org.uk

Fathers Reaching Out

https://www.reachingoutpmh.co.uk/

Run by Mark Williams, campaigner, speaker and writer, offering support to dads.

FiveXMore

A grassroots organisation committed to changing Black women and birthing people’s maternal health outcomes in the UK.

Email: [e-mail]

Gingerbread

Single parents, equal families. Help and advice on the issues that matter to lone parents.

• helpline: 0808 802 0925
• website: www.gingerbread.org.uk

The Hub of Hope

A directory of mental health support around the UK.

LGBT Mummies

Supporting LGBT+ women & people globally on the path to motherhood or parenthood.

Email: [e-mail]

Make Birth Better (Birth Trauma Support)

Email: [e-mail]

Maternal OCD

Peer support available, email [e-mail] to arrange

Mayah's Legacy

Supporting and empowering anyone who has experienced pregnancy loss to advocate for themselves.

Email: [e-mail]

0300 102 1596

The Motherhood Group

Dedicated to sharing and supporting the black maternal experience through peer support, projects and advocacy.

[e-mail]

Motivational Mums Club

Offering Trauma, Mindfulness and Meditation sessions for Mothers and Mums to be with an NHS Mental Health Specialist, who’s also a Mother.

[e-mail]

Music Football Fatherhood

Open conversations around fatherhood, including blogs, peer support and podcasts.

[e-mail]

Muslim Women’s Network

Helpline: 0800 999 5786, open Mon-Fri 10am –

4pm with support offered in English, Urdu, Punjabi, Mirpuri, Putwari, Hindko,

and Bengali.

Email: [e-mail]

Online chat: www.mwnhelpline.co.uk

Text: 07415 206 936

National Autistic Society

www.autism.org.uk

Support and advice for parents and carers of autistic children, including support to develop a greater understanding of their child’s needs and accessing services that meet the family's needs.

Netmums

Netmums offer peer support via their Maternal Mental Health Drop-In

Clinic.

NHS

Contact your local GP surgery.

Call the NHS on 111

or contact a local NHS urgent mental health helpline

If you are in crisis, visit Accident & Emergency at your nearest hospital.

PANDAS

Helpline open from 9am-8pm every day – 0843 2898 401

Email support available – [e-mail]

Perinatal Wellbeing Ontario

PRENATAL, PREGNANCY AND POSTPARTUM SUPPORT & CONNECTION in Canada

[e-mail]

Petals

Petals offers free-of-charge specialist counselling to anyone who has experienced pregnancy

or baby loss.

Web: petalscharity.org/counsellingcontact/

Email: [e-mail]

Tel: [phone]

PMH Support

Scott Mair is a consultant in paternal mental health and parent education, Peer support trainer. Dad,...