Honoring Ourselves

Warrior DIVAS | Real Talk for Real Women

Hello, everybody, this is Angie Leigh Monroe, your host of Warrior DIVAS | Real Talk for Real Women and I am so jazzed today, let's say jazz because I want to say awesome. I don't want to use all these other words, let's say jazz today, and we are about to have a great show. But before we get to that, I just want to remind you all about our conference October 11 and 12th. In Grapevine, Texas, you can go to our DIVASImpact.com website to learn more about it, but it's going to be an Unmasked conference. What does Unmasked mean? It means we are going to be peeling back the layers of gunk that we've built up over the years in our lives to kind of hide who we really want to be from the world. And we're just going to start unveiling some amazing things about each other at this conference, and I'm super excited. We're lining up some great speakers for it. We've got some opportunities for you to come in and be interviewed on pop for a podcast, maybe even think about launching your own podcast. We've got some amazing things building for this conference. So, stay tuned, go to DIVASImpact.com/unmasked, and you will learn more about that.
So on with today's show, and like I tell you every week I am Angie Leigh Monroe, and I am your girlfriend. What does being your girlfriend mean? It means that we can get real and we can talk about the stuff we need to talk about. Now today I want to talk about why the other people in your life named you to be a DIVA. I mean, let's get real. You hear the word diva and you hear; you think of somebody like Mariah Carey, Celine Dion, Whitney Houston. Some of these are great, amazing singers that can sing, but their attitudes aren't not always necessarily known for being the best, right? Because they are so good at what their attitude has them demanding more from everybody around them. Now, I'm not saying expecting more from others around you is a bad thing, but what I want to talk about today is not about what you expect of others, but what you expect of yourself. See, we've talked before the D in DIVAS is destined. So, what is your purpose? What is your calling? What are you destined for?
I, is for Inspired? Who are you inspiring? Who have you been inspired by? What have you been inspired by? And what are you inspiring others to do?
The V is for Victory. We all have had issues and challenges in our life, where we may have been a victim or victimized at one time, but we can walk boldly, confidently, that's our key word here boldly and confidently, as a victorious person.
Then the A is for Accountable. You know, one of the things that I've started to realize is a lot of women want somebody that they can be accountable with. That they don't know how to build that relationship. Excuse me. So, and then they don't know how to do that with women, because they either don't like women, or they are constantly battling women with women, butting heads feeling like the mean girls or, are feeling like a reject from the popular crowd. And some of us talk about, oh, well, that stuff stopped in junior high. Well, it did, but it didn't, because we still see evidence of it. When we watch shows out there like Bad Girls Club, or Real Housewives, or even The Bachelorette, we see it happen all the time.
So, what I want to talk to you today is, why it's important to be a woman that has these characteristics and these values. Because I get asked all the time, why should guys have an interest in DIVAS Impact? And I use this little tidbit with them; I tell them, you know, do you have a wife? Some of them will say no. Like, okay, do you have a daughter? No. Do you have a sister? No. Do you work with women? That's the time this gets them, and those sometimes, they'll still say no. So, were you born of a mother? Have you ever seen a woman? Normally at that point they have to cave in. Here's what's happening right now is we are putting women in the spotlight. When we talk about equality when we talk about pay equality, when we talked about the glass ceilings, when we talked about being victimized on the way to the top. You know, it used to be this whole thing that women always slept their way to the top and it was just a known thing, right? Now the women are standing up and pushing back, but are we doing it in a way that is honoring of ourselves? That's the that's the question I want to ask today. Are we doing it in a way that is honoring of ourselves? So recently, I wrote a letter that kind of had a play on words to one of my state representatives, and it was about an issue going on here in Texas with the plumbing board and stuff because my husband and I own a plumbing company together. And I wrote the phrase off of the crystal adu song that says what you're going to do with the cowboy. I wrote the words ‘what you can do with a plumber’, and I started thinking to myself, what you going to do with a DIVA? Hmm, you know, I think I might rewrite crystal Deuce lyrics to be what you're going to do with a DIVA? Because I want to, I want to talk to you for the next few minutes, about what employers, what bosses, bosses, well, that's an employer. So, let's just, you know, errr erase that part and go back to what a company can do with a woman that is a DIVA? What a husband can do with a woman that's a DIVA? What kids can do with a mom, that's a DIVA? We're going to talk about some of those things today, because those are the things that are going to help us really embrace and understand this movement. We're on to empower and equip women.
So, if a woman knows what her plan and her purposes for her life are, she's not constantly trying to jump on the bandwagon at every little thing that comes by. So, there is a way that you can look, and you can say, Okay, what is your path? What are you on? What do you do? Well, I am a woman that is a speaker, a coach and consultant. So, I work one on one with people, I work with businesses, I work with nonprofits, I help encourage, empower, and equip a global community of women change agents to make a positive impact on the world. How do I do that? I do that through our social media. I do that through one on one meetings, I do that through group trainings, I do that through speaking events, I do that through our conference. I do that through this podcast. So, we are very clear as to what our mission is and very soon, we'll have our magazine up. So, in launching again, as we're doing those things, we are constantly finding ways to touch the lives of women, and to highlight the lives of women that have tapped into what their purpose is, what they're calling is, and they know that the journey they are on is the destiny that they were purposed for.
So, then what we find is, when women are doing that, they're not looking for fulfillment in 1000 different places, they are focused, they are trained, they are conditioning for the race that they are on, right? So, I don't know if you've ever heard of run for the year, run the year, or something like that. So like 2019 is this year. So, it's the goal to run 2019 miles this year. Okay, first off if you're watching on YouTube, you can look at me and see that I'm not a runner. All right, but here's, the big thing that I am, I'm a walker, I'll get out and walk. I'll do that no problem. So, taking that time frame and going, Okay, I can get out and walk, breaking down 2019 into however many days of the week, I'm going to walk and going okay, I need to hit this many miles a week to be able to hit my goal for 2019. Some days that may be a mile some days that may be 10 miles. So, whatever that looks like, I broke it down because I know the goal, I'm trying to meet. I know the destiny I'm on to reach that goal. Same goes with destined women, we know the goal, the purpose we're on and we know where we want to go and we know what we want to do, but we are going to get on the journey. I got frazzled yesterday when I was getting ready to go and work an expo and when I got on and did a Facebook Live. I was just transparent with my audience. I told them I was frazzled, but I also told him that as frazzled as I was, as almost fearful as I was walking into what I was about to do, I was still doing it, I was still moving towards it, because my goal is at the end of what my journey is.
So, the other part of it is, is inspiring, because here's the thing. I have people that inspire me each and every day, they encouraged me, they motivate me, they inspire me to keep going. But the other part of it too, is I constantly hear from other women that are watching what we're doing and are excited about what we're doing and they are inspired to do more for their sphere of influence, and the people that they get to impact. Now, when we talked about the victory thing, you know, I can go out and say, well, I've got this, and I've got that, we've done this, and we've got this many followers, and we've got this many people converting, and we’ve sold so many shirts, and we've sold so many of this and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's not the type of victory that I'm talking about. The victory I'm talking about is the lives that were impacting. I have had stuff happen in my life, and if you don't know that, you can go back and listen to some of the first episodes we did of this podcast. But we don't talk about those things from a point of me still being stuck in those things. What we talked about is how we overcame those things to continue our journey towards our destiny.
The other part is, is that accountability, side of things. I want to be that Sister, I want to be that accountable person, I need somebody to hold me accountable. Well then, the other part of yourself is going well, I shouldn't need somebody to hold me accountable. I know what I need to do. I know how I need to do it, I'm just not doing it. But we all need relationship, right? That relationship is what helps us grow and evolve and dig deeper to launch this podcast and get things going. I had an idea of how I wanted it to go, I had a lot of things that I had put in place, but I went outside of myself, and I got professionals to come alongside me and help me, people that have been there who have done it, who have had success in those arenas. Here's the biggest thing that we as women do ourselves, is we get out there and we start trying to figure out how to do it ourselves. We try and reinvent the wheel that's been invented since the beginning of time. It's crazy, we beat ourselves up, because we are too afraid to ask for help, and being in an accountable relationship allows you to tear down the mask of you have all your stuff together. To be able to be real with yourself and say, you know, this part of my life's a little messy and I need some help getting some clutter played out of it, can you help me? I'm right there. I have places in my life that I constantly challenge those that I give permission to, to speak into those areas of my life and help me clean them up. I did it when we launched the podcast. I said, as we're launching this, I want you to tell me three amazing things that you liked and give me one thing that I can work one, because I constantly want to grow and evolve. So, what is it that you want to grow and evolve in? Is it getting a new job? Is it finding a job? Is it setting your home to make it a more peaceful place for your family to come home to? Is it being a better wife or mother? What is it that you want to do? Is it learning how to volunteer, or start your own nonprofit or your own business, or write a book or speak whatever it is? Find somebody to hold you accountable to it, and like we said with the sisterhood thing, let's get real. Not all girls are meant to be girlfriends with everybody. Right? But that doesn't mean you shouldn't try. I get tickled whenever guys come up to me and they're like, so because it's DIVAS and you're talking about sisters, we don't need to be a part of it. Right? Like, Absolutely not. We have a hashtag for our guys, and it's called studs. If the guys are listening to this, we want you to send us a message and it will tell you what studs is the acronym for; you know, we've got Paul, and we've got Donnie, and we've got Nate, and they're all studs. My husband is a stud. My husband's also known as aka Mr. DIVA, but we use those guys as ways to help us grow, help us look into the places that we may need some correction, that we may have some blind spots, that we may need some professionalism, that maybe what we're looking for isn't out there in the world, that women are providing these services yet at the level we need them to. That's fine, but we will soon be there. I'll still be working with these guys, but the other part, the other reason why guys need women to rise up as DIVAS, is because imagine the atmosphere in your home, in your work environment. If a woman wasn’t constantly, second guessing herself, wasn’t constantly acting as an atmosphere in your environment that was wavering, you had to walk on eggshells because her emotions were fractured.
See, I know we don't like to talk about it. Somebody's got to. We're going to talk about the ugly right now. How many times have you worked with a woman or women who have used their emotions to manipulate a workplace, or manipulate a marriage relationship, or boyfriend/girlfriend relationship? How many times have you seen that? I mean, they make shows about it. It's sitcoms, its dramas, it's everything, and it's so well known that the men throw fits about it. Man, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. When women are doing that, a lot of the times it's because they don't feel like they're being heard, and they don't feel like they're being valued.
Women, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. When you sit in a room and you roll your eyes, or you huff, or you're constantly asking somebody about something and nagging them about something, whether it be in the workplace or at home (and I remember one of the episodes I said my short name is ANG and in Microsoft Word changes it to nag every time). So, my husband gets the biggest kick out of that, but the biggest thing I want you to realize is all these things that we do, don't empower us. They actually rob us of our power. There's a book out called the Male Factor, and if you haven't read it, it's a great book. I read it several years ago and was just floored by some of the stuff that I had seen in that book and it was written by a woman out in East, I think she's in East Texas, Feldman is her last name. I'll put in the comments, the link to the book, but the thing about this book was she was talking about how a woman who was up for being promoted on an executive team. She was the best candidate for that team, but her attitude with all the other men in the room, had them all on edge. She was completely unaware. She would roll their eyes at them; she would throw a little fit; she would have when they were talking if she didn't find their voice valuable. Here's the thing; none of the guys did that to her when she was talking, but she did that to them. She had worked herself out of a promotion, because of the way she had acted.
Here's another story; you know, we had a guy not too long-ago post on our thing, and he was being open and honest with us. As he was talking, it made me flashback to some of our early years in our marriage. See, back in our early days, I wasn't strong. I was really self-conscious about a lot of things. I didn't have any friends. So, my husband would go to work all day, he would come home at night, I'd be worn out from the kids, and I would just be on him the moment he walked in the door. I would want him to help me with this, I would want him to help me with that, I needed him for this, I needed him for that. A lot of the things was, I just needed a girlfriend, because I was asking my husband to be everything for me. Instead of being just my partner that we got our marriage together, we got our kids together. I was asking him to, you know, what do I need to do with this outfit? What do I need to do with this hair? What do I need to do with the kid’s party? What do I need to do with all these different things, and I was constantly wearing him out? So, when we're talking about the sisterhood, you need girlfriends, you don't have to have; there's women out there that will have 25-30 best friends, and then there's people that are more like me that has just an inner circle of really close friends. Then each circle of friends grows out and out now, and there's flow between each of those. There's different seasons that some girlfriends are closer than other girlfriends, but we all need a DIVA in our life. We all need those women that are walking in their purpose. They know they're calling; they know where they're going. They're know how they're getting there. They don't need a map. They don't need a GPS, because they are in tune with where they're going, and they are encouraging and inspiring so many others to do the same. So, my question to you is, what are you going to do with the DIVA? Are you helping raise DIVAS? Are you a DIVA? Are you on the road to being a diva? because let me tell you, I'm not talking about coming in here and being some pretentious person and demanding things of everybody else. What I'm saying is you start blazing the trail for others to follow and for others to be like you.
So, I want to share with you today about a girl that's helping me be the DIVA that I am and really one of those that kind of sticks that stick at me, that “poke don't poke the bear.” She kind of just pokes the bear every once in a while, and her name is Kim Slater. She's today's EVERYDAY DIVA, and Kim is one of those that will ask a question and leave me going, but wait a minute, I didn't want to talk about that right now. She does it in such a unique way, in such a unique fashion to help me grow, and every time it sets me on a new level of growth as we go. The other part that I love about Kim is we've got our logo behind us and our logo is the Warrior DIVAS Impact; Warrior DIVAS logo, Real Talk for Real Women and she's done our logos for our companies and puts together our magazine that's coming out. So, she is our creative genius behind things. She doesn't feel devalued by coming in and working in talking with me and helping things. She embraces that, because her mission is the same mission as ours. Her mission is to reach women and help them on a path of wellness and health mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually equipping them and empowering them. So, we married together very well. Now if she wasn't on that same path, we may be acquaintances, but because she's on that same path with us, we are able to do so much more and be so much more and reach so much more, because she is in tune with what our mission is. So I want to encourage you as you start looking at our social media over the next week to learn about Kim, know who she is, if you have any graphic arts design work that needs to be done, if you have projects for that she is the one that we recommend for what we do and she will help you with that 100%. She is amazing at what she does, and I can't wait for you to see the magazine that we're putting out. So, if you want it online or in print, either one and you can also subscribe, you can subscribe to that you can also submit articles to the magazine for future volumes of it. So, there is a lot there is always a lot that we have going on here. And the best way to stay connected with us is through our DIVAS Impact Inner Circle on Facebook. You can also stay tuned with us at DIVASImpact.com. Our podcasts are up there, news about the conferences up there, the magazine will be launched there, and I just want to remind you this time next, this same channel this time, next time we will be here on the podcast. And I'm your girlfriend, Angie Leigh Monroe. Talk to you next time. Bye